ED pomes/diet/ shirt story

quote

Depression is not an act ,
Eating disorder aren't phased,
Suicide isn't a cowards escape,
Homosexuality isn't a disease,
Self harm is not a cry for attention,
Stop acting like you know everything

Brush your teeth, paint your nails call it self-care we both know the darkness beneath think abouf your decoying teeth

At school I chewed on gum. When I got home I was  happy I laid in my room craving food I searched the cupboards for a healthy snack, but it tunds in to what it always does a binge, I ate a whole packet of chips the guilt haunted me. So I didn't eat dinner, knowing I was going to binge again.

You told me I eat to much. I skipped  dinner that night you told me my thighs jiggle when I walk...I workout til I was sick you told me my belly rolls when I sit.... I didn't eat for 3 days, I want Dow 2 pants sizes.  My bones start to show my hair start falling out on the shower. I am always cold....I got dizzy every time I stood up...but hay....at least you finally thought I was pretty

When the disorder is loud it's because thangs screen when thay are dying

The only way out is through

Never trust something that wants to kill you

Guilt is temporary regret is forever

Recovery is like a roller coaster there always ups and downs

I meet a new friend today when I was 11 she told me I didn't look
Like other girls my age she told me I didn't need the last bidet of dinner around the age of 12 would be a good sub for a meal at 13 to read instead of eating lunch. Around 14 she told me about cutting and 12 + without food she told me to starve was the only way to look like her. She wants me to  be perfect at age 15 no matter how hard I try she wouldn't leave her name is Lola aka Ed she was with me for life.

The  absolute worst part of having an eating disorder is that even though your know your getting sicker your unable to stop yourself from getting worst