Cryo can't hurt Cryo (but it can, it really can)

Chapter 2

Kaeya briskly threw the papers to the side, trying to sort through this massive load of paperwork. Ever since Diluc came back two days ago, it'd been hectic. Everyone was asking where he had gone and why he was back now. Of course, this shouldn't affect him. But it does. Diluc is finally back after four years.. it's almost too good to be true.

He'd only managed to get a glimpse of him so far, but that was enough to send Kaeya spiraling down memory lane- both good and bad. Leaving as quickly as he could, he ran back to his house. He remembers leaning on his door breathing heavily and tears pricking his eyes. He wasn't ready to face him yet. He was so glad that he was back after so long he truly was.. but he was scared. Hell- he was terrified.

After so long would Diluc forgive him? Would he even acknowledge him? Kaeya remembers his vision blacking out after not being able to take in enough oxygen and waking up on the ground in front of his door.

A knock on the door shook him out of his thoughts and he looked up.

"Come in."

In came Jean, her hair tied back in a high ponytail, bags under her eyes yet they gleamed with life and energy.

"Kaeya. Are you finally doing your paperwork?" She asked, mildly surprised.

Kaeya smirked and sighed, hanging her a thick stack of papers he had already finished.

"These are the ones I've finished so far."

Jeans eyebrows raised. "That much? There's so many.." Kaeya resisted the urge to groan knowingly, he was the one who did it all.

"Its because of all the stupid Hilichurls that are getting braver and getting closer and closer to Mondstats gates. The people are getting worried and nervous and I keep telling them it'll be ok but no matter what I do it won't he enough until all the goddamn Hilichurls are gone-"

"Kaeya. You're rambling."

Kaeya couldn't help the blush that bloomed on his face, embarrassed he let himself get so worked up in front of his boss.

"It's ok. I get it, there's a lot going on right now. And did you hear that-"

"Yes I know Diluc is back." Kaeya snapped. He closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair, resting his forehead on the palm of his hand.

"I wanted to ask.. If you were doing ok? It's not everyday your brother c-"

"He's not my brother." Kaeya muttered. Jean gulped and nodded. Diluc had made that painfully obvious that night. They were no longer brothers nor friends, but rather strangers. Even though Kaeya wanted to be more, wanted to be brothers once again he knew it was hopeless.

"If you ever need anyone to talk to.. Just remember I'm always here." Jean said softly, her blue eyes filled with sympathy and pity. It made Kaeya's skin crawl. He doesn't deserve pity. If Jean knew what he was she wouldn't be giving him pity.

"Yeah.."

Silence engulfed the room before Jean cleared her throat turning back to the door. "Well, I'll let you get back to your paperwork, Captain." She teased before closing the door behind her leaving Kaeya alone again.

Cavalry Captain. Such a useless name anyways when they had no cavalry. Just like him. Useless.

Kaeya sighed again before pushing all his paperwork to the side again. He could finish it later, he already did a lot today. He needed a drink, and he knew just where to go to get one.

...

The clattering of glasses and people talking rang through the air that smelled like alcohol, but it was a comforting smell to Kaeya.

He always came here. People assumed he just liked to drink- which was partially true- but he would just drink until he couldn't think until he was simply gone from this world in another one- where everything was better.

Though that's what he liked to do, he always refrained himself from doing it too much, he didn't want to cause too much of a bad reputation for himself. He could only imagine an old lady shaking her head at him saying, "I'm not mad.. just.. disappointed."

Hearing anyone ever say they were disappointed in him was secretly probably one of his biggest fears. Not being enough, never being enough, just being the way- Kaeya couldn't stand it.

He felt like his whole life he has simply disappointed everyone. First, his father. Not being able to do what he was supposed to come to Mondstat to do. Next, Master Crepus. He was too late to save him from his death, all because he was inefficient. Then Diluc. He had failed his brother- ex-brother when he hadn't been there for him. When Crepus died and Kaeya wasn't there. When he went and spilled all his secrets to Diluc so selfishly, without thinking of how it would affect him..

Deciding he was done with thinking for tonight, he would let himself drink until he almost couldn't stand tonight. After Diluc coming back and all the chaos it has created, and the knights not doing what they were supposed to do and him offering to help Jean with her way to much paperwork, even if he was suffering himself, he think needed a well deserved break, and a nice fresh Death After Noon.

Sliding up to the bar he took a seat, waiting for Charles to come out from the back room to help him. What he didn't expect however was a curtained red haired male to step out from the back room, a stoic expression on his face.

Kaeyas breath immediately sped up. No- no no no what's he doing here? I'm not ready to talk to him yet please no-

However, when Diluc saw him, it was a reaction he hadn't expected, yet he didn't expect anything more. Maybe yelling, screaming.. Maybe a hug-?

"What would you like?" He addressed him without even glancing a second time at him. Deciding to put on his normal charm, he smirked and replied,

"One Death After Noon please, Diluc."

Diluc paused before making his drink. "It's Master Diluc to you. Don't forget that." His words were sharp and harsh, making Kaeya slightly shrink back in his seat.

My ex-brother comes back after being gone for 4 fucking years and has to remind you that its all your fault that things are like this. Well, what was I expecting, a hug? No. Well... Maybe?

"Alright, then Master Diluc. A Death After Noon, please." Kaeya recovered his posture and smirked again. Diluc didn't say anything else, simply turning around and starting his drink.

Kaeya sat there, tracing his fingers over the coin he carries everywhere. The worn out ridges reminded him of himself. He felt worn out and tired, yet continued to carry on like everything was fine when inside he was tired. Tired of everything, of the same routine everyday.

The thud of a glass made him look up, smiling slightly as he noticed the enticing drink in front of him.

"Thank you, D- Master Diluc." Kaeya quickly corrected himself.

Diluc merely glared at him before continuing to take other orders and make more drinks.

Kaeya leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs and taking a sip of the strong alcohol burning his throat, yet it was a welcoming feeling.

And so Kaeya scanned Diluc subtly, watching his every move. It hurt his head to think that his ex-brother was back after so long, yet there is so much distance between them.

Kaeya looked down at his drink before picking it up and finishing it. He looked at Diluc to see him already looking at him, which made Kaeya raise a brow before smirking and lifting his glass, silently asking for a refill.

This would be a long night.