[ B.F.S ]

Chapter 2 (Edited)

I awoke to the sound of screaming from the bottom floor. Loud, almost ear-splitting screams. I didn't bother to look presentable as I rushed down the lavish white staircase. Tori was sleeping on the couch, the sounds coming from her. She thrashed this way and that, mouthing incoherent sentences.

I walked over to her as silently as possible, trying my best not to wake her. I sat down, caressing her face. "Shhh, let me take care of you for once," My voice was quiet as I let the sentence fall through my lips. I silently hoped that somehow, they would have a magical effect. To my disbelief, her screaming seem to calm down before her eyes started to flicker open.

Tori, although I would never admit this to her, had always been there for me and had always been the one to bring me back up again. When it came to Beck, when it came to my parent's disappointment. Although most times I felt her advice was unsolicited, more often than not it made me feel...better. 

"Jade?" The latina's voice was hoarse and barely audible as she spoke but she still smiled through her pain as she saw me. I felt the tickling of that terrible feeling that we all call guilt , felt it about all the times I was mean, I had no idea her life was so lonely. So...devoid.

"Sorry, it's just...you were screaming and I didn't know what else to do except be there.." She nodded slowly as her tussled brown hair framed her face.

We stared at each other as neither seemed to know what to say, my hand still placed on her. I seemed to notice right when she did. My face felt warm with embarrassment as I quickly let go.

"So..I was thinking we could skip school today?" Tori slowly got up from her sleeping position on the couch and stretched her arms whilst yawning.

"Fine but I'm not speaking about Beck," I huffed as she stared at me expectantly.

"Fair, I won't speak about my problems either. Let's just have a.. girls' day!" I tried not to smile at her attempt to cheer us both up. It truly amazed me how relentless this girl seemed to be. I guess it's what made me compelled to her in a sense. I wonder what you think of me, Tori.

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Tori's POV

I truly wished with all my will that Jade would not ask me about my nightmares. They had been going on for a very long time now, each time worse than the last.

I looked over towards Jade as she seemed to sit in deep thought. Guess she won't be asking me. Good. I stretched once again as I got up from my seat on the couch and walked towards the kitchen. Just as I was about to open the cabinet to reach for some cups, I felt Jade behind me.

I turned around, cups in hand. I was already dreading the conversation even if it wasn't happening actively.

"So uhm..where are your parents, Vega?" As she said those words, the recent events of my life and nightmares came to light. I felt lightheaded and I couldn't find the words to express myself.

I felt distraught as the next words out of my mouth held too much weight, "They're...We- They were in a car accident." Jade looked toward me, her face impassive. It gave no indication to her feelings. "Jade, they're d- they've-...they're in a better place now." I felt my throat constrict with tightness as tears began to pour themselves onto my face.

"I am so sorry." Jade stood up from her stool, walking towards me. I felt myself jerk as she attempted to give me a hug. It was uncommon for her, and I never really seemed to like physical touch. I didn't grow up in a household where we hugged, I grew up in one where we destroyed each other. I sighed mentally as I found comfort in the brunette's hug.

Jade held on to me tighter as I realized I had been shaking with anger. I felt mad. Mad at my mom for causing the fight, mad that we didn't stop it, and most of all, mad that he didn't notice the truck coming towards us.

I hadn't been to school in weeks but no one knew what was going on. They assumed I was on a top secret mission as I had plainly replied to Cat as I knew the ditzy red-head would blabber to everyone. I wouldn't need to explain myself. I loved Cat, but she certainly could not keep a thing to herself.

As Jade let me go, I stood still. Everything in my life felt like it was falling apart. Everything felt impossible.

"I know I shouldn't be here," The goth girl took a deep breath as she looked down at her all black pajamas, "...but I hope you'll let me stay." I smiled lightly through my pain as I heard her soft voice, so unlike her.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay, but we still need a girl's day. We've never spent a whole day together." I felt a bit of dread as she nodded along to my suggestion but the thought of getting to know the real Jade, outweighed my rationality.

I assumed she was nodding out of pity, or maybe we both had such fucked up lives that we needed something to look forward to. Whatever it might've been, I took it as a good thing and didn't dare waste any time. You don't wait for a girl like Jade, ever.

I focused on putting the coffee pots into the coffee machine and watched the cups fill slowly, taking them out just before they spilt onto the counter. Trina isn't back yet. I continued on to the fridge where I took out some milk and cereal to pour into bowls. Lucky charms, mom's favorite. I hadn't eaten anything else but cereal as I felt too much pain. It was unbearable. Most days, I could barely walk to and from the kitchen.

It wasn't even physical pain, which made me feel all the more worse. It was so painful to think of the memories that we had created in this very house, of the fun times, and the bad.

"We can go to the mall first, if you want." I suggested as I slid the brunette her bowl of food. She looked up slightly, teal and black hair framing her face.

"..We could watch a movie? Or...?" She looked back down to her bowl as I failed to reply. I used to watch movies with my dad before...I felt the tightening of my throat once again as I held up my hand to signal for her to wait. I quickly ran to the downstair's bathroom. I didn't want Jade to see me cry again. I felt pathetic.

I stared at myself in the mirror as the tears poured out uncontrollably, mascara seemingly staining my tanned cheeks as my hair glistened with grease. My eye bags were so noticeable, I looked deranged. My cheekbones were far too prominent, my face sunken in. My lips cracked as I breathed, hot and heavy, great sobs.

I heard light foot steps approaching as I tried to wash away the makeup and exhaustion. Soft knocking resounded as I wiped my face, roughly, with a dirty towel. I couldn't bring myself to open the door as I once again stared at the mirror. I reached out my hand slowly, almost to touch my face. This isn't real, Tori. Let it be a dream. Let it be...

"Tori! Don't do this to yourself!" The door burst open as a panicked Jade fell into my eye line. She looked genuinely worried, her breaths heavy from the force she had to pry the door open with.

"I'm okay, Jade. Let's watch those movies." I smiled but I knew it didn't reach my eyes by the way Jade seemed to avoid my stare. I guess I creep her out now. Get used to this, there's no more 'Tori' left in me.

I plopped down onto my couch as Jade followed suit, reaching for the remote. She handed it to me, "Your pick?" I found it slightly odd but I did as told, not wanting to argue with her.

I picked First Kill, a series. Nothing had really sparked my interest until I accidentally clicked on the cover. Jade didn't seem to mind watching it either. Two teenagers in love, how cliche.