"How long does it take to unpack?" Mike whines, he's so impatient. He always has to be near El, or on the phone with El, or too busy talking about El to care about anything else. God forbid he care about anything else honestly, like how dare that idea even be out in the world.
Lucas is rolling his eyes, so is Dustin. "God Will, you are so lucky you didn't witness this violent whining for a whole year." I can't imagine what it must have been like. I don't think I could've handled it but to be fair I'm not honestly handling the whole long distance friendship either. Especially when he doesn't really talk to me.
"I'm not whining, ok? I just want to spend as much time with El as possible. I don't see her like you see Max everyday." Mike sounds irritated which I don't think is fair. El and Max really missed each other. At least they talked often unlike Mike and I.
"Max and I broke up months ago Mike. After the... the incident." Sometimes it's hard to talk about what happened to all of us. We all feel differently about it and cope differently. We try to make jokes, try to be ok with it but it's impossible. What happened was... it was terrifying.
Dustin hasn't talked for a minute. I look over at him, he looks older. He's not the little kid I tried to race home when I got taken, he's older now. I can see it in his face, his eyes, his eyes tell you that he's seen too much. "Yeah, and Suzie and I have only met in real life once." Dustin's point makes a pretty good argument. Mike can't really beat that.
"Hm." Mike hums, you can tell he's frustrated. I can't say I understand. I haven't dated or been with anyone yet, because I'm different. Or maybe I do understand because Mike makes me feel the same kind of frustration without even realizing it.
"You could always focus on seeing Will." Dustin adds but Mike just gives a half hearted smile and nods. I wanted it to be more then that but sure that works. Sometimes it's hard to believe what Mom says about Mike, she says he was by my side almost the entire time we were in the hospital incident. Because why wasn't he next to Els side? Oh right she wasn't there. That's because I'm only important when she's not around. That's why I feel like Mom is wrong about how he was with me. I remember some of it but I block a lot of the memory out because I wasn't me.
I wanted to start a conversation, maybe about DnD, what the highschool is like, how basketball is for Lucas. I wanted to hear everything but as if on queue El and Max walk in. I remember Lucas and Max's break up. How hard it was for both of them. El immediately goes to sit next to Mike, Max just looks around my room. "I like your room, Will." Max smiles at me and I nod a thank you to her. She's really cool. I wish I'd known her longer before moving. That time she told El that she was better then Mike and El completely dumped Mike I wanted to laugh so bad. But Mike would've obliterated me. "What were you nerds talking about?" Max asks and Lucas and Dustin immediately have a smirk on their face.
"Oh y'know, Mike's annoying whining for El." Dustin's goofy grin makes me so happy, I miss these guys so much. So so much.
"'Oh I missed El soooooo much'" Lucas taunts and Dustin starts to add more to it.
"'I just want to spend as much time with her as I can.'" My two friends have faux voices trying to sound more like Mike. I start to laugh, I haven't laughed as much as I used to. Before it all happened. I miss the party, DnD, Castle Byers. Even if I did destroy Castle Byers.
"Stop I'm going to puke." Max jokes, shoving Lucas slightly. I didn't even notice that she'd migrated towards him. Those two are still so in love it hurts. Mike and El are practically making out on my bed and it makes me want to cry. I feel like my eyes are going to fall out of my head. I can't do it. Everyone else got to fall in love but then there's me. Even Jonathan has Nancy. I'm the last single Byer family member, well kind of. There's Mom but Hopper and Bob...I just choose to not count Mom she doesn't need anyone. Or want anyone at this point.
I get up saying a quiet 'I'm going to use the restroom.' before escaping to my bathroom. Jonathan catches my eye on the way there, Nancy and him are sitting on the couch. My eyes start to well up. I think he saw me. Why can't I be normal? Why do I have to be this way? I want to be normal. I want to fall in love. I want to fall in love with a girl, but I can't. I've tried so hard to force myself to like girls but no matter what I do or try it doesn't work. Tears start to slip down my face. I stare at myself in the mirror for a minute. Then I think to myself 'I'm genuinely pathetic.' and my tears start to fall faster and I start to sob.
I hear a knock on the door, how long have I been in here crying. No longer then 5 minutes, right? "Will, it's um, it's Max. Are you ok? You left kind of abruptly and I wanted to make sure you were ok." Maxs voice was softer then I've heard it before. We don't know each other very well, why didn't she send Lucas or Dustin?
I take a couple of seconds to breath. "I'm," Deep breath Will "I'm ok Max. Thank you though." I try to keep my voice steady but it doesn't work.
"Can I come in?"
Something in me wants to let her come in. To let her see. I think she'd understand but I don't know. "Um," That was all I could push out of my mouth.
"You don't have to let me in but if you want to, you can trust me." Max sounds so genuine that I let her in. I let someone into the bathroom while I sob. Someone my age, not Jonathan, not Mom, someone who isn't related to me. "You're not ok, are you?" Max sighs after closing the door behind her. No I'm really not.
