Note: I know it's stupid on my part, to write out my sentiments through Shehnaaz, bringing such concept, that ain't familiar or relatable to you guys much. You may always wonder why she speaks about her Sana or that past again. But believe me this Watty and my books are my happy place. Things or thoughts I can't share and grief with anyone I can vent them here. May be boring for some. But still how does it matter when gives your writer much needed sukoon🤧
Shehnaaz enters her room after about three weeks now. Everything was the same, resting peacefully in its right place, nothing was out of order. How had life changed so much within this short span of time? Why did everything seem so out of order?
'What's taking you so long Sid? Our bond ain't that week. What's taking you so long to realize this? Why are you doing this to me? This waiting is getting too long and painful. Please come back to me. I need you. Please come back before its too late.'
Shehnaaz takes in long breaths, Shehnaaz can smell him, as if he was around there somewhere near her but he wasn't. It was only his room, nothing else. She felt like that because she wanted to feel that way. She wanted to feel him with her; she craved for his presence, longed for his love and was dying slowly without him. She felt herself fading. Time is supposed to heal all wounds why was it intensifying them for her?
Shehnaaz never knew she would be strong enough to take in this much pain, the pain of losing her life, her seedling, her blood, but she knew that the pang of separation would be unbearable for her. Losing Sidharth was intolerable, agonizing beyond limits, horrendous. The thought of it sank her heart.
"You have to come back. I can and will wait for you till my last breath. But please don't make me do that." She says, her heart throbbing like an Angels wings.
Shehnaaz sighs and hikes towards the wardrobe. She takes out an old suit case and starts keeping her clothes in it. Sometimes the uncertainty of your future eats you up alive and you find it hard to defend yourself against all darkness, obscurity and shadows. She places everything inside abstractedly.
A while passes, the door opens with a thunderous batter.
There Sidharth is, standing still, panting heavily, his eyes blood-spattered, body drenched in sweat, and existence utterly traumatized, blood still dripping from his wounded hand and within from his wounded heart.
His eyes, rendered speechless, shift between Shehnaaz and the suit case. His mind races like a horse as he stares in shock. He stands there still, unable to decide, his mind dumbfound. Not until his grief was overtaken by fear and then emotions did he run towards her, like one runs for something he had longed for a life.
Shehnaaz's mind boggles, deciding whether she was hallucinating or could her prayers be answered so soon. And when the mind was dominated by the heart all she wanted was to believe it, be it reality or farce.
Everything stops, their minds and hearts as he takes her in his embrace, forgetting about the world, shutting behind the past, getting lost in the moment one can live a life in.
Don't they say the happiest moment of your life is the one which makes you cry the most? You can't decide whether they are the tears of joy or tears of pain, but when they flood, they take away all the sorrows and grievances with them which had made home inside you. This is the best time to let go of everything that is darkening your life, and that too forever.
"I am sorry Shehnaaz"
His hold tightens and his voice is weak and scrawny, like he had been crying.
Shehnaaz loses herself to him and cries her heart out, sobbing harder. All they needed was a shoulder to cry on and now was the time for all the pain to bleed out.
