181 Days of Madeline Jesty

Chapter 8: Safe Environment

I couldn't sleep last night, tirelessly thinking whether I should continue my plan or not. Would I be so selfish for asking someone to fill in my gaps and remind me what a perfect life should feel like? Should I depend on someone I had a one-night stand with to enjoy my remaining days? My mind wandered to a place of pure bliss, forgetting that my life was given a due date, intentionally overlooking that I had to suffer on my own. Maybe if death angels were only so kind to appear before us humans, proving that a beautiful place for the dead existed, then all of humanity wouldn't be so afraid, ready to accept that life wasn't a gift but a debt to be returned eventually.

Mickey didn't bother me as agreed, so I just left a note on her seat when she was out of the classroom. It was today that I told her we would be discussing matters I roughly mentioned yesterday, and never did I imagine I would bargain for the feeling of self-fulfillment. Before that, I had to make sure that she knew nothing about my curse, that she was indeed a human, and that her hourglass with unmoving grains meant nothing but an irregularity. But how?

These were on my mind as Steph and I walked our way to the parking lot where our drivers were waiting when it took me by surprise when she jumped in front of me. She seemed fidgety the whole day, as if something was bothering her.

"You've been acting weird all day, you know," I told her.

"I . . . I just want you to be happy, Maddie." She then hugged me, which was odder than her uneasiness. "Remember, if you don't want to agree to things, you can always say no. And say it firmly, okay?"

"What are you talking about?" I asked with a questioning smile. "You of all people know I don't easily agree. What's happening? Is there something wrong?"

It was then that I realized a man in a black suit—one of Isles's bodyguards, I believe—was peeking behind a tree nearby. The last time this happened, Steph and I had an argument, and Steph's family forced her to apologize to me even though I was at fault. I had no knowledge of how much their family regarded ours or how much they owed to Mom for her elders to force her do such an act, but at that moment, I somehow did. While I would definitely spend a dime just to see Jane beg for my forgiveness, it was not for Steph's case; she was my most genuine friend after all. It left a bitter taste, and the real exchange of apologies only happened during a private talk. After that, I swore it wouldn't happen again.

"Five o'clock," I whispered, giving the position of her security. "Don't look—"

She shook head and held my hand with her right, her left pointing at her earphones. "I . . . I know. They're just careful that I won't spill anything. Please be safe, Maddie."

"Spill what?" I asked, confused, but her security already interrupted. Without a word, Steph just lip-synched goodbye and left, her face showing worry. I immediately looked at my phone because I knew she'd send a message, but since there was none, I assumed hers was confiscated. But why?

"Ready to go, Ms. Maddie?" Troy appeared out of nowhere and carried my bag. "Suzie told me to bring you home early."

"Why?" But he only shrugged. I just sat on the backseat and looked at my watch. "Just a few more minutes. We'll have company."

"Oh, a friend other than Ms. Isles?

"You seem surprised."

"It is surprising."

Troy then went back to our car, while I waited for a few more seconds before I followed. But a few more minutes had passed and no Mickey was in sight. Troy assured me he was fine to wait, but frustrated with the turn of events, thinking she had backed out or had not seen the note, I ordered, "Let's just go."