Duskwood: after episode 10

Chapter 7

"I might be drunk, Jake. But what I see in front of me.. I know it's real." I yell wanting to get Jake's attention

I point him with my finger,
"I know it's you."

This time, I was ready to face him. Ask him why he did what he did.
I needed answers. Naked truths.
My head was still spinning a little, but I was certain that I was not hallucinating.
I knew it was actually him this time.

He stops moving and freezes instantly.
His back is turned and he doesn't make an effort to look at me in the eyes.
It's like he is ashamed.

"Please." I beg tearing up

The amount of damage that this "sorry" did, was unbelievable.
He noticed from the way I talked, just by the sound of my voice, that something was off.

Now he is slowly turning around, but his head is still lowered.
His gaze locked on the ground.

"Why did you do this, Jake?
Why haven't you contacted me since- fuck, I don't even know since when?" I yell tearing up, desperately demanding an answer

"And don't tell me that it's because you wanted to protect me, because that's bullshit." I quickly add wiping my tears with my sleeve

There is a long pause.

I don't know what else to say, what else to ask.
There is a part of me that constantly says that this conversation is pointless, but the other says that I should be a little more patient.
I just want him to take advantage of this opportunity, and give him space.

He seems to be thinking really carefully what he is going to do next, and I'm not sure what that is.
I could see he was feeling uneasy.

~~~~~

After a few minutes of deep thought, he finally decides to do the unexpected.

He walks quickly towards me and when he finally reaches me, he cups his hands on my cheeks.
And then, his lips are moving against mine.

Time seems to have stopped.
It was like everything froze.
It was just me and him.
Kissing in the darkness.

It was a kiss we both needed.

When he is out of breath, he releases my face slowly.
His forehead is leaning against mine and his lips seem to be wanting more.
Despite that, he remains contained.

I think we both have dreamt about this moment.
Our lips crushed against the other's.
And now, it has finally become reality.

We both are breathing heavily, and our hearts are beating like crazy.
I don't even attempt to start a conversation.
I don't want to.
I just want to enjoy this moment.
These few seconds of silence and peace.

But at some point, he decides to break the silence. He wanted to give an explanation for his actions. Why he decided to act the way he did, and why now. Where he had been this whole entire time.
I deserved it after all.

"I am terribly sorry Y/N."

His hands are now sliding down my back, eventually securing them on my waist.

He draws a deep breath and continues.

"I'm sorry that you haven't heard from me.
It's just...
I was there, Y/N. In the mine, with your friend, Richy... It was- it was too late." he stuttered

He pauses and waits for my response, but I wanted to listen what he had to say.
I wanted to understand what he was feeling.

"I didn't know what your reaction would be.. I didn't want to disappoint you, Y/N. Neither you nor the others.
What was I supposed to tell you? I am afraid I was unable to save your friend, although I was there?"

"The truth Jake." I reply slowly
"All this confusion could have been prevented if you had just said something."

I take a small pause.

"I... I thought you were dead Jake." I say silently trying not to break down

He wipes my tears off my cheeks with his thumbs and takes a good look at me.

"You have no idea how sorry I am, Y/N.
I am certain that messaging you would be a better idea, but I just couldn't find the courage to talk to you after that incident.
I felt.. I felt like I failed to complete my task.
I wish I could take it back, Y/N. I really do. But unfortunately, I can't.
I hope I can fix it somehow, in the near future..."

My face is now buried in his chest and his hands are awkwardly wrapped around me.

>>>>>>>>>>

We must have stayed like this for a while, but I don't remember much...
All I could hear was his whispers, "I'm sorry", and tender kisses on my forehead.

After that I remember being lifted up and carried to a car.
Not much after that.