A young lioness

Camp jitters

Maeva's point of view:

The car journey to camp takes around 2 hours, with every minute that passes I begin to feel more and more sick. My mum keeps looking over at me and sighing, I know what she's thinking. She will be wondering why yet again I'm letting my anxiety control me, but I can't help it!
We pull up to St. George's park and I feel as though I may faint. I can see the training facilities from the car window and for once my breathlessness is not caused by anxiety, I'm left in awe at the amazing pitches and high tech equipment they have here. My mind for a second was taken away from the dread and then suddenly a door opening takes me right back down to reality.
One of the back room staff is stood by my opened car door beaming at me, I try my best to muster up a half hearted smile and he could probably tell as he gave me a small chuckle in return. He informed me of the social media people and how they would be videoing my entrance so it was in my best interest to look like I was on top of the world- with this he took my bags and I said goodbye to my mum.
As I walked away from the car I noticed them filming at the top of the steps, I put a smile on my face and walked towards them.

"Maeva Williams, first time in camp, how are we feeling?"
I chuckled slightly at this, " Yeah I feel good thank you, a little bit nervous but yeah ready to get going and meet the girls!"

We finished the interaction with a fist bump and I knew that my face was going to be on Instagram any minute, the downfall of social media...
I was greeted by Sarina, who gave me a hug and told me not to worry, which left me knowing that I obviously didn't hide my anxiety well enough. She led me through the plan for the evening and told me I was rooming with Keira Walsh. I wasn't too fussed on roommates considering I don't know any of them but I heard that she was nice from some teammates back at Everton!
Sarina and I had just finished our conversation when Leah Williamson came up and gave me a hug.

"Hi, you must be Maeva! I'm Leah, I've heard great things about you. I'm sure you are nervous but just wanted to let you know that I'm always here if you need. Obviously, being the captain and all that, it's my job to look out for you! Do you want to meet the rest of the girls and then you can get settled in?"

I could do nothing but nod, I was terrified. Leah seems lovely but she doesn't know about how anxious I am or how shy I can be and I definitely can't unload that on her now after I couldn't bring myself to say a word to her. I think she understands slightly though as she gives me a warm smile and leads me through to the dining area where all the girls are sat.

"Right listen up everyone, this is Maeva. I'm sure most of you saw her name on the squad list, obviously this is her first time at camp so I want everyone to make her feel welcome."

I stood there like a lemon, my face going redder and redder with every word Leah said. I appreciated her kind words, however I now had 21 eyes on me and I have never wanted the ground to swallow me up more. I didn't know what to say so I just smiled slightly, hoping that they would get the memo that I was not up for talking right now.
Before I knew it, Keira walked up to me and introduced herself whilst Leah was still stood next to me.

" Hi I'm Keira, but you can call me Kei. Apparently we are rooming together so do you want me to show you where our room is?"

I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out so I quickly closed it and just nodded. I saw out the corner of my eye, Leah and Kiera exchanging a look which only made my anxiety risen. With this, Keira took me up to our room and gave me a room key. She didn't ask any questions on the way there which I was so very grateful for. As she passed me the room key and unlocked the door, I flashed her a small smile as a thank you, hoping she didn't think I was rude. She left me to unpack and I sat staring out the window wondering how on earth I was going to survive this...

Keira's Point of View:

I was left beyond confused walking back to the dining area, Maeva didn't say a word the whole trip to the room. I walked back to where the girls where and went to sit with Leah, Jordan, and Lucy.

"Leah, has the new girl said anything to you yet?"
"No kei, not a word. I'm thinking she might be just overwhelmed but I don't know, it's a little weird."

Jordan looks over to us and laughs, "what are you two so deeply discussing?"

I fire her a look and reply saying, "Maeva". She nods and agrees that it's strange how she's not said a word yet. I sat there zoned out, wondering if Maeva was okay by herself in the room but gathered she probably likes her own company considering her silence. I'm pulled out of my daze with a jab in the ribs from Lucy, who nods her head to the left. I look over and see Maeva, awkwardly, walking into the room, so I wave her over. She complies and comes over to sit, her face as white as a sheet with no expression of emotion at all. I smile and she returns the smile weakly, still not saying a word.

Maeva's point of view:

I could feel Keira's eyes on me from where I was sat, she looked concerned so I decided to look interested in Leah and Jordan's debate over what Christmas jumper to get Blu. The pair continued to go back and forth and I couldn't really stand to sit in silence any longer, I noticed some of the girls start to get up and go back to their rooms so I rose from my table and did the same. As I was walking away from the table, I for sure knew that the girls thought I was rude for not saying anything, if only they knew about my anxiety and how severe it was.
I opened the door to mine and Keira's room and decided to stick my AirPods in to calm my breathing. I didn't fancying getting grilled by Keira so I hopped into bed hoping that by the time she got back I would be asleep, it was only 19:42 but an early night was probably the best thing for me after the day I had.

Keira's point of view:

It was 20:10 when I reached the room, I opened the door to pure silence- not that this surprised me considering the roommate I had been gifted. I looked over at Maeva and she was sound asleep, I wondered how long she had been in bed for considering it was so early. I flopped over onto the bed next to hers and was thinking about my quiet roommate, I decided to pop Leah a text hoping that she would bring some clarity on the events of today.

Keira: Leah do you think Maeva feels uncomfortable around everyone?

Leah: I don't know Kei, it seems like she is just really overwhelmed. I mean the kid is only 17 so this is all new. She's got no one here she knows from club either so she may just take some time to warm up?

Keira: Yeah I suppose you're right Le, guess we will have to see if she gets more comfortable as camp goes on. She's already asleep so maybe she was just exhausted after all.

Leah: Yeah, we were terrified for our first camp and we had each other! I will talk to her tomorrow to make sure she's doing okay, hopefully she will get more involved. Training might give her an opportunity to get to know everyone better also.

Keira: Thanks Le, you really are the best captain!

Leah managed to put my mind at ease a bit, but I just can't help feeling like there is something going on beneath just being overwhelmed. I turned off the lights and decided that it would be best to put it to bed and see what tomorrow brings.