Coffee Nuisance

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"Hey baby." I heard from behind me startling me since I wasn't expecting anybody, its to fucking early for human interaction. Turning around quickly I come face to face with a not to bad looking man, I mean he's not ugly, but I also wouldn't exactly call him handsome, or maybe it's just that I'm gay

"Um," glancing around I made sure that he was talking to me and not some other person, nope just me "hi?" I wasnt sure why he was talking to me, there's a chance I know him and just don't remember, maybe we share a class. I mean this is the campus cafe so that would make sense, but he doesn't look the least bit familiar, plus he called me baby and that's just no

"Hey," he said again giving me what i assume is a charming smirk, who even smirks in real life like that "I haven't seen you around here before." oh God no. I had to hold back a groan realizing what was about to happen "You come here often?" yep there it is

"No." I didn't hold back my eye roll turning back to the counter hoping he would get the memo and leave me alone

"Oh cool." he did not get the memo "So are you new around here?" he kept talking, if he hadn't started with the whole 'hey baby' thing, didn't seem so cocky, wasnt a man, and just like wasnt talking to me in general I may have given this conversation a chance. But seeing as he's done all of that I have no interest in him

"No." one-word answers are probably the best way to go

"Oh, really so you go here?" he stepped up closer, so he was right next to me. Sighing I nodded my head, maybe if I don't talk at all he'll stop "Thats cool so do I." great add him to the list of people to avoid here "Maybe we can hang out some time." he suggested, I absa-fucking-lutely will not be doing that

Looking away from the counter I had been studying I looked to my side giving him a quick once over. He was wearing a polo shirt and kakis with a snap back set backwards on his head, seriously dude it's like 7 in the morning what the fuck are you dressed for

"No thanks." I told him bluntly watching his smile drop for a second before coming back looking even smugger than before

"Come on baby no need to play hard to get." oh, so he's laying out the douche real hard all out of nowhere like that, ok then "I can show you a good time." you're definitely showing me why I don't like men

"It's still a no." I told him bluntly a sense of relief coming over me when the barista finally placed my coffees down "Thanks." I quickly thanked her before grabbing my coffee's and going to leave only to realize I still had to wait for her, oh for fucks sa- hurry the fuck up women 

"Two coffees for one person?" he questioned looking at me with pinched brows "Are you here with someone?" instead of answering I stared at the wall finding the pattern very interesting, it was a blank brown wall, but it was still more interesting than that guy "I'm gonna take that as a no." before I could react, he had taken the coffee from my hand and began drinking it

"Dude what the fuck!" I screamed at him, did this dumb ass seriously just take my coffee, well technically it isn't mine but it for fucking sure isn't his

"What don't tell me you were going to drink both these on your own." he looked at me incredulously like I was the crazy one here "That much caffeine is bad for you." he spoke before taking another sip of the drink scrunching up his nose at the taste "This is really bad who drinks their coffee like this?" this bitch

"First of all, it's not even yours you can't complain," I seethed "Second who in their right mind takes a random persons drink like that and third of all were in a coffee shop get your own fucking coffee." I had a lot more to say but he obviously wasnt listening judging by the way he was studying the cup, and by the fact that he cut me off before I could finish yelling at him

"Is this your name?" I asked looking at the cup "Well Lauren if it's a coffee your worried about I can always take you out another time and buy you a new on maybe even some dinner." is this real life am I talking to a real live human being right now. I stared gapping at the smug fuck for a few second before opening my mouth to say something only for another voice to cut me off

"Is that my coffee?" me and the guy both looked to the side to see a very confused looking Lauren standing there staring at the cup in the guy's head "A girl can't even change her pad without someone stealing her coffee." Laruen stepped forward snatching her coffee from the guy hand brushing past him aggressively as she went. He stumbled to the side slightly seeming confused as to what was happening only for a smirk to come onto his face as his eyes ran over Laurens form, oh for fucks sake

"Hey baby." is he serious like this is a real-life human man standing in front of me right now

"Are you ready to go." Lauren completely disregarded his presence turning to me and motioning towards the door, I had class, and she has to go do whatever she has to do I honestly don't even know. Probably just going to go back to her apartment and sleep until noon then maybe go to the studio, I think she has that scheduled today

"Ya." I nodded going to step away only for the guy to stop us

"Hey, we were talking." he protested stepping in front of our path to the door. Laurens gaze flicked up to him running over his figure for a second before settling back on his face, she rolled her eyes looking unimpressed. The guy seemed to recoil slightly not having expected that

"No." she pressed locking eyes with him a blank expression on her face "You were talking your obnoxiously loud voice could be heard even in the bathroom." with that said she once again began to walk away only to stop "Oh." she turned to him holding her hand out "20 bucks." he seemed confused but reached into his back pocket seeming intimidated by her, fuck ya you go girl

"For what?" his voice was shaky Laurens unwavering gaze and hard voice seeming to unnerve him

"The coffee." he pulled out a few bills handing them to her "And the new one I'll have to buy." she quickly counted the bills before shoving them into her back pocket and once again walking away "Oh and," she turned slightly looking back at the guy "she only likes when I call her baby." without another word she reached over and grabbed my hand intertwining out fingers

She pulled me next to her leaning over and placing a kiss on my cheek right before we left the cafe. Glancing back, she made sure the guy was watching a satisfied smirk on her face as we walked towards my first class. I lasted a few seconds before bursting out laughing the whole situation seeming funny to me now

"What?" Lauren asked glancing over at me her brows pinched in confusion

"That dude had like no game." I wheezed out 

"He really didn't." she chuckled along

"And he looked like he was about to piss himself when you were talking to him." I laughed remembering the look on his face "I'm not sure what is was, but he was terrified of you." she shrugged

"Honestly I don't know either, but it worked out." she pulled the money out of her pocket spreading it out and fanning herself "The coffee was like five bucks." she laughed harder

"That was probably my favorite part I mean he just handed it over like nothing." the two of us continued to talk and laugh until we were in front of my class

"Alright baby." she stressed the word a teasing smirk on her face "I'll see you later." I rolled my eyes smiling none the less

"By love you." I leaned forward pressing a kiss to her lips

"Love you too."

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