Falling

11

"Hey Charlie," I say, pushing myself up on the countertop at the register.

Before I could get onto my point of being here, Charlie spoke up, "Look, Stan, I'm not selling to you today. You need a chill break if you already used up the stuff you bought a few days ago." Charlie was always reading a magazine when he didn't have to ring people up. He had dark hair like mine, though his was more shaggy. While I have grown mine out over the years, it still isn't a mullet like Charlie's. He also has short stubble that he never shaves, yet it never grows past being just that. Stubble.

"That's not why I'm here," though I am out of the stuff I bought a few days ago. But I wasn't going to tell him that.

Saying that I wasn't here for more alcohol caught the scruffy male's attention. He lifted his gaze to look at me briefly to show he was engaged before moving it back to the magazine, "Alright then. What's on your mind?"

I came right down here after I went to Tweek Bros with my friends. I needed to go over everything that had happened; without getting too specific. Because I don't state the name of the person I like, I just refer to them as, "So you know that person I like?" Yeah, I know, creative, right? Whatever, it gets the point across without me having to say who this said person was.

I've never gotten specific about that person I like when I refer to them around Charlie. Hair color, no. Age, no. Gender, no. And as I've said—name, NO. So that's why this next part caused some confusion, to say the least, "Oh, yeah, that redheaded boy. What's his name, Kathy?"

I widened my eyes from the shock that came from what Charlie had said. While I was surprised that Charlie knew who that person I like is, I couldn't help but focus on a different detail first: "You just said he's a boy, and you think his name is Kathy?"

"Hey, gender norms are to dominate in today's society, so I'm just guessing based on his aura," the man said, keeping his eyes glued to the pages.

"Aura?"

"Yes, aura. Congratulations, you can repeat words."

I lift a finger, about to respond to the sarcastic comment just stated. But I got sidetracked back to the thing I really wanted to focus on at the moment, "Wait, how did you even know who the person I like is?"

Charlie sighs, moving the magazine down and lifting his head to the sealing, "You really need to stick with one topic at a time, Marsh."

"Well, it's hard not to bounce between different things when there are so many things that I need to address. Speaking of which, answer the question."

Charlie's annoyed expression quickly changed to a smirk as he turned to face me, "Because it's insanely obvious." My eyes narrow, and I part my lips about to chime in. But yet again, I'm beaten to the punch, "I mean, dude, people are often bad at hiding who they like, but with you, it's just a whole new level of pathetic."

"Pathetic!?"

"Yes. Let me rephrase for the word choice to make more sense. It is typically pathetic how bad people are at hiding who they like. But with you, it's so blatantly obvious who you're drooling over that you've reached a new level. You're not pathetic; you're deplorable."

My eyes widen to their max, "Deplorable!?" While I wanted to let him have it, I was just too shocked at the harsh word choice to get much out.

"There you go again. If you keep repeating words so often, it's going to lose being deserving of a celebration," Charlie redirects his eyes back to the magazine. Fuck, he always wins.

"Gee, Charlie, you're right. I should stop being confused about your insults. I should know better by now," I know it seems like I said that in a sarcastic tone, but I really should expect those sarcastic insults whenever I see Charlie. I guess the shock comes from never knowing in what way he's going to jab at me.

To be fair, I had reason to be taken aback by some things during this interaction. For starters, Charlie knew I liked a Kyle without me ever stating or hinting at it; well, any hinting I know of. Then, adding to that, he even was aware I liked a boy when I never talked about my sexuality with him—wait.

"Wait, so you know I like a boy?"

"Uh, yeah? Kylie, I thought we went over that part."

I roll my eyes, "Kyle, his name is Kyle." I make sure to not get distracted again, "But like you knew, I liked a guy, and I confirmed it to your face during this conversation?"

Charlie lowered his magazine once more to look at me, "Yeah... I feel you're getting at something, but I'm not sure what."

A lump sort of forms in my throat. I swallow, but it doesn't go away, so I take a deep breath, "Uh, well, you're kind of the only person I've done... well, whatever this was with, or to." I was nervous about this whole realization. As I talked, I kept my eyes lowered to make this less dificult, but I still felt a knot form in my stomach.

There was a silence that lay over us for a while. I started to regret all of this, stating that Charlie's assumption about the person I like is accurate. Worst of all—telling Charlie he is the first person I've, sort of, I don't know; kind of in a non-specific way come out to. And now I've ruined everything with someone who I really care about and need in my life.

He probably thinks I'm a freak. I stand there holding my right arm, trying my hardest not to let the tears fall as they start to pool. He's not responding, most likely hoping I'll take the hint and leave. Well, if that's the case, then I better—without even finishing my thought, I get pulled into a hug.

"Thank you."

"For what," I chuckle, trying to make it seem like this didn't mean much to me.

"For trusting me. Even if it was an accident," we more softly laughed for a moment. "I also want you to know I'm not going to judge you and be any more of a bitch to you, though I might tease you more about sir Kyle here," I laugh again. "And if you're doubting any of this, just know that I've been aware you've liked this boy for a long long long long long—"

"Get to the point, Charles."

"Time, and it seems you never guessed that."

At this point, I was crying as I hugged Charlie back, but not because I was sad. "Thanks. And on the topic, I'm still not sure how I identify."

"That's fine. You'll get there, and it seems like you've just taken a big step, so take a second to breathe, Stan. You have time; there's no rush."

"Yeah, I guess it's just stressful."

"I hear you. And hey, you can always talk to me." Charlie pulled away from me, playing his hands on my shoulders, "Because Stan, I care about you. You're like a brother, and I want you to know that. Since, well, I'm not the most obvious about that."

We share a smile as I wipe away my tears, feeling, well, feeling safe.

***

...Well, I kept intending to write, but the intention took a while till I followed through with it. Schools started now too, so that didn't help. I'll get the next part up ASAP <3<3<3