bruised beauty..

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The bruises around my neck were almost impossible to hide, so I gave up trying. My voice was still a little raspy but it was nothing compared to what I could endure. One thing I knew for certain, Demi was pissed, she had a new found ambiance to her that was out for blood and if she had a say in it, she'd be putting Shayna into early retirement.

I knew that she could put her away but I made her promise that she wouldn't snap when fighting baszler. She had been very overprotective when it came to my injuries, always checking in on my, looking at what movements caused me any pain and I had grown tired of it. I loved her dearly but she didn't need to mother me every time I got injured. I was strong enough to take care of myself.

She came up to me again, having already done this 4 times today, grabbing my chin and looking at my bruises again. "Let's see." "Dem stop." She looked confused "I'm sorry do you not want me looking after You?" And there it is, it wasn't what she said, it was how she said it, the sarcastic tone she used when she asked that question set me off and she was not prepared for what was going to happen. "Not really Dem! I have been trying my hardest to not pay attention to them and you keep making it known! I'm already insecure about it and I don't need them to be checked every two fucking minutes!" She stepped back in shock, analysing the tears that fell down my face, I wasn't sad rather stressed and angry at myself for snapping the way I did. My anger outbursts were difficult to control and I didn't know Why they happened, because I'd always end up angry at myself.

"Dem.. i-" "don't. Don't" she shook her head, tears brimming in her eyes as she walked past me, heading toward the bathroom. I nearly broke down right then and there but I knew it would break her, so holding back tears I grabbed a bag, put some clothes in it and left, slamming the door behind me.

Demi pov:

I flinched at the sound of the front door, slamming shut. "Shit. SHIT!" I punched the wall, I had caused this. This was my fault. I had to keep my distance, for now at least. There were only two people that could bring them back to me.

Save Syd!!!
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I need help! Now

T: what's up bab
I: yh what's wrong

It's Syd. They had an outburst. And I made it worse. They just took off

T: shit! We'll keep an eye out
I: she's either at Oscars or studio

Okay! I'll keep an eye out. Thx!!!

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Syd pov:

I knew that they'd all be looking for me. Izzy, trav, demi. I knew they'd find me, even if they did I wouldn't hear them. I had my headphones on so loud that I couldn't hear myself let alone anyone else. I was in the studio, my dad's office to be exact and I was doing the only thing that couldn't harm me or anyone else, painting that mural. After a moment of relaxation the door opening in my peripheral vision alerted that I was no longer alone. I continued to paint, not wanting to talk, giving my friends and girlfriend a side glance. Their muffled voices were inaudible to me and I really didn't care what they had to say, I had blown up again, fucked up, again. It was my fault, again and no matter how hard I tried, I never learned. In that moment  everything around me blanked and I lived for it.

My headphones were pulled off by the tattooed hand of my girlfriend "Syd! Look at me!" She grabbed my hand and my face, staring into the blank expression that I held strong, looking for any emotion. "Syd please.. talk to me." I looked her dead in the eye, glistening tears forming in her waterline "this is my fault. I'm asking you to let me figure this out on my own." I said to her, trying not to cry but the tears forming in my eyes were making it difficult. I pulled my headphones back on and my focus shifted to the wall I was painting. I couldn't let it last long though with demi pulling my headphones off again. "We can do this together.. remember our promises?" It made me a little sick remembering the promises I made and weren't living up to. I looked down at her hands, interlaced with mine, before looking back to her eyes. "I can't let you take responsibility. Go home." "Where are you gonna go?" I turned back to the mural but was still talking to her "nowhere." She nodded and moved away, I pulled my headphones back on and blanked everything out. No matter how loud my music was, the sense of being watched was much more prominent, I knew she hadn't left, Izzy and trav had but she hadn't. I knew why, demi was convinced that I would change my mind if we were alone. I wouldn't, but she wanted me home, I needed to make sure that I wasn't going to snap the way I did today

After about an hour she left, knowing I would not change my mind, I did not stop painting until the mural was finished. I didn't even realize that I had been painting for nearly 6 hours, it was 11:00PM, I did need to go home, whether I wanted to or not, it was something I needed to do. So I got changed, washed up my hands and headed home, being as quiet as I could when walking around. I peered into our bedroom and saw her in bed, I couldn't tell if she was asleep or not, so I grabbed the closest pyjamas I could reach before going to the master bathroom, getting changed and keeping myself in check, I headed to the spare bedroom, not wanting to disturb demi anymore than I already might've. I loved her but I didn't trust myself to lash out again. I couldn't put her through that uncertainty againz I hated myself for getting angry and I knew she didn't care but I did. I struggled a lot with my temper, I couldn't hurt her with another split.

Demi pov:

She was worried about me, I had been warned about their temper and to just leave them be with it. I knew how much they were hurting but if I interfered I'd make things worse, so for now I was going to let them talk when she wants to talk.

~𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕟𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕖~Where stories live. Discover now