Starlight (a twilight fanfic)

chapter twelve: choices

okay so heres chapter 12, i didnt make a banner for this chapter but i posted a link for a youtube vid, i may have already posted it but :S yeah, so, not much else. ive been kinda busy with other stuf like reading other wattpad books, i have a bad habit of just adding books upon books so that i end up with a billion to read. old habits die hard... ps sorry for any grammatical mistakes in this i hate editing...

_dannie xoxo

"Melanie," Edward began, "you can't possibly think that way."

What way? Unless he was talking about  the fact that I was determined to be a vampire to bleed out my human memories, then I had no idea whatsoever as to what he was talking about.

"Yes. Exactly that." He said, his eyebrows furrowing together.

"But I have no family or friends left! They're all dead! I know I can stay here, and I'm grateful, but I'm human! You're all-" I paused, "not..."

"It's okay Mel." Bella spoke up. "I know how you feel."

"You do?"

"Yes, I use to be just like you, I wanted to become a vampire, but not the same reasons as yours." She seemed to be remembering something, something distant...

"What happened?"

She took a deep breath and began quite a lengthy speech.

"When I was dating Edward, I wanted to become one of his kind. He was hesitant, not wanting to take away my soul-" she paused.

"Some of us don't believe in having souls in this life." Edward finished off for her.

"Exactly. Anyway, I kept asking, and he made a deal with me. If I married him, then he would change me himself. After the wedding, I started holding back the day I was to be changed, I was enjoying the- honeymoon- alot."

Edward grinned cheekily. I mentally blushed, guessing what bella had skipped out of the story for my benefit.

"Anyway, I became pregnant with renesmee, and because I was still human , and Edward being a vampire, the baby was half of each. The baby was stronger than me, and I was close to dying. During the birth, I managed to survive just long enough for Edward to save me." She finished off, her thoughts starting to wander elsewhere.

"My point is, there are things you're going to give up, things you have to sacrifice, and good things around the corner. You just have to take the time to decide. Don't rush."

"So, if I still decide yes, would you?"

"I wouldn't count on that." Edward said.

"Why?"

"You haven't lost everything from your past."

I frowned. Of course I had lost everything in my past- my parents, my sister, my brother-in-law, my cousin (I didn't really count Bree's feral father as "family") hell, I didn't even know where Jamie was.

"That's what I'm trying to point out." Edward stated.

"What?"

"You didn't lose your whole childhood, you didn't lose Jamie to death. You just moved. He can still be somewhere."

"But he could be dead." I mumbled, choking on the words. I was determined to not stay sitting out as a weak human, even though I'd probably be throwing away the chance of reuniting with my best friend.

My point was, I'd just given up on the whole idea of hope. It was a foreign concept to me.

Why should I have hope now? At what chance would I have at finding Jamie? He could be dead. And if he was alive, there were a million places he could be, and not to mention, he would be sixteen now. What if he had a girlfriend?