Distance.
The absence of his presence was what I woke up and went to sleep too. His side of the bed was cold when I ran my hand over the bedsheets in the morning. Dinners would always be eaten alone, a text saying "I'll be home late, eat without me" or "I'll be home soon" he sent didn't substitute his disappearence from their home. It's like he was never there, because he wasn't. I'm married to a ghost.
The past couple of weeks were full of impactful events. Anna's death and Voight's constant look of blame every time he looks at me, the explosion I was having nightmare's from, saving a rapist instead of the victim, covering up a murder and lying to my team every day about. The constant rotation of playing good and bad cop was catching up to me. When will it end? It wont. I can't control Voight, let alone Him and my Husband, who he's dragging down with him. Their so in sync now, I can't even pull them apart. Hell, I feel like i'm being cheated on. I don't see Jay anymore because he's always with Voight. And when were on a case, it's always us three. Ready to cover up eachother's dirty mistakes and doing things off book. I don't even know who I am anymore. I can't look at myself in the morning and see myself as Hailey Upton. I'm dissapearing right along with my marriage. Along with this image I hold up every day for work, for this city that i'm trying my best to protect. But, it isn't enough. Nothing we do is enough.
When will it end?
YOU ARE READING
Please Don't Go
FanfictionHow Hailey is dealing with everything going on before Jay's departure, and her breakdown that follows. - still not over Jay's exit, so i'm writting this with my broken heart for upstead. *MATURE*
