a soulmate that wasn't meant to be

chapter 1

TW: abuse? bullying

Love. A feeling. Some people say its the best feelings in the world and some others say its the worst. Well I think its the worst. I always get dressed good, make my hair look good, put a smile on my face just for him to see. But he only has eyes for his girlfriend. That he is dazai osamu. He has soft dark brown hair and dark pierced eyes, he wears bandages all over his body, he has a little scar on his cheek and his face is beautiful. In my opinion he is the prettiest person I have ever seen. His eyes, his nose, his mouth, his hair, his body, his scars, his stupid jokes, his idiotic smile. He is perfect. I love him. But love doesn't work both ways sometimes and that's what happened with me. Everybody that loved me replaced me, hurt me or just didn't care anymore and some others when I loved them and gave them all my heart, they had given their heart to someone else.

Im chuuya nakahara, a cool 15 year old, I like drinking and smoking, I skateboard, I have always my nails black, wears eyeliner everytime I get out of the house, I have three ear piercings and messy ginger hair. Everybody says im pretty cool to be around with but then talk behind my back, but I don't really care. I have already gotten hurt a thousand times even by my own brother so it just doesn't touch me. Oh and I play the electric guitar, I can sing a few songs too but after falling to the dark side with the drugs I just never touched the guitar again.

My mom and dad left me so I live with my older brother verlaine. In my opinion he is pretty badass but I don't want him to know that. But he can be a bastard too.

_____

"Chuuya! Get down here and explain that mess in the kitchen!" Verlaine started yelling "I can't!" "Are you doing drugs again! Get your lazy ass down here!" the ginger sighed and unlocked himself from his room "Why are there empty wine bottles!? I told you I needed them!-" "oh yeah for your date" the blonde man slapped him "Clean them all up and go buy some wine. If you're not back at 1 hour I'm taking your cigarettes and motorcycle away, even if its illegal to use it." chuuya was furious but he knew he had to do as his brother said, he pushed him aside and ran to the store. Suddenly he met someone while running "ohh chuuya! How are you doing?" it was dazai and his girlfriend, he knew that she was just trying to make him jealous because she was by dazai's side, not him, but he didn't snap at her and just took a deep breath and whispered to himself "Give me a break" "Chuuuu! I missed you!" before he could get even more anxiety, a pair of arms hugged him, suddenly everything went quiet. It was just the bruenette and him. A hug. He wanted to stay in his arms forever. "I missed you too asshole." he said while hiding his blushing face and turning away, suddenly an annoying voice was heard "Come on babeeee! We will lose the tickets!" it was this bitch, dazai's girlfriend, chuuya clicked his tongue rolled his eyes "Oh yeah wait! I'm sorry chuu, see you at school!" and just like that he walked away, of course he would choose to hangout with his girlfriend, I mean they were going on a date anyways. Chuuya hit the trash bin next to him and continued walking while trying to find something to make him feel better.

He returned home just to find his brother making out with a black haired dude "I bought the wine, have fun" he said and locked himself in his room leaving in awkwardness. He took out a cigarette and started smoking as he looked out the window while sighing "Its never my turn right?" he said to himself and went to sleep.

The next day

The ginger was late for school, he did his eyeliner fast, wore an oversized shirt he had on his floor for days and some jeans and run to school "Look who's late again" some kids whispered and laughed as chuuya walked into the class "Mr nakahara-" "im late i know" he sat in his sit just to find his desk full written with stuff like "gay freak" "emo" "loser" "fatherless" but he didn't got mad, he was used to it, everyone calling him a freak and bullying him. At the break they pushed him in a corner and beat the shit out of him "Aww why doesn't the freak say anything? Don't tell me! You like me too?" "Ewww" "Gross" suddenly dazai's girlfriend came, she pushed everyone away and got chuuya to the nurse, maybe he thought she was mean and wanted to make him jealous when she was just a kind soul "Nurse! Nurse! He needs help!" Chuuya coughed some blood as she got even more worried "hey hey its gonna be alright..! I called dazai! He is coming to help too! Oh my God youre coughing blood.. Nurse!"

Her name was emu. She had blonde with dark pink hair and deep light brown eyes. She was wearing old Japanese style clothes like specific shirts and beautiful jeans. Her style was pretty cool. She had a kind soul too. Maybe when someone first saw her would think she's mean but she's actually kind at the people that are close with her. She plays the drums and she has beat the shit out of the biggest bully of the school. Shes pretty cool.

Suddenly dazai pushed everyone aside and ran to chuuya "Hey hey hey what happened?! I told you to tell me when you're getting bullied!" the ginger didn't answer and just continued coughing as the nurse arrived, the bruenette had a worried look on his face but he ran to the bullies "Dazai-!" emu went to grab his hand but he pushed her aside "Emu I'm not letting anyone treat chuuya like this." Chuuya was skin and bones so it was easy to beat him up and dazai too but he would risk his life for him. Even if he went to beat them, they beat him but when chuuya saw him and started yelling of how he shouldn't have done it he was just laughing "What are you fricking laughing at?!" Dazai smiled and hugged chuuya tight by his waist "i thought you diedddd" the ginger started blushing and smiled softly "im alright" "your beaten up body and face says otherwise" they both giggled as they walked out of the school while holding each others hand

Author notes:
Hey guys! I know i have two other fanfics to continue but I'm going through a hard time in my life right now with mental health and love so I wanted to express it with a fanfic. I love you all so much<3 here are some playlist you can listen to while reading<33

Soukoku playlist:
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1egkzT029oacKnNrIeZzHn?si=v_e18CBASJq-XeQCVPrMtQ&utm_source=copy-link

Chuuya's thought playlist (being in love with someone that doesn't love you back):
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4GCcRmHvGzcA7gyDk0OPDX?si=V7-uG8DSSGeUiAhZV1EB3g&utm_source=copy-link

And if you want to text me your ideas my discord is shortcake!#6782 oh and if you have any soukoku fanarts saved please send me them im dying for soukoku fanarts

☆