The Book Club

Chapter Eleven

Robin's POV
I sat across from Nancy, admiring her presence while it lasted. It wasn't too long before Nancy packed up and left for a university that was across the state. Nancy's eyes started to well up with tears, making my eyes do the same. It was so hard to look at her so upset but I wasn't about to beg her to stay. I wasn't going to risk her future for my own good. That would just be selfish. I have to say something though. She's waiting for me to say something and I just want to process her leaving. I want to take in the news before I respond. I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. I just sit there with my mouth open like a complete idiot while she closes her eyes and turns her head away from me, trying to hide the tears that rolled down her cheeks. "Nance," I take my hand away from hers and wipe off her cheek. She's supposed to be happy about her new beginning but I'm dragging her down. "I want you to be happy. I want you to go and live out your dreams in the giant stone buildings and drink coffee while reading a book and spend way too much money on an education. I want you to do it even if I'm not there." I choked back my tears while I watched her wipe off her face. She tried to speak but her words were just a jumbled mess of sobbing and tears. "Nancy, I'm not going to break up with you. You're my girlfriend even if you're across the state." This was completely true. The last thing I wanted was to break up with Nancy. I saw us going far. I saw us being endgame.
"Girlfriend?" Nancy asked with a soft giggle. I loved it when she because it was so soft and sweet. Wait, what? Did I just call Nancy my girlfriend? Have I don't that before? Shit, well I mean she is... unless she doesn't want to be. Oh no. "Rob..."
"I'm sorry. I understand if you-" Nancy cut off my blubbering with a kiss, her lips pressing against mine. My eyes closed as I put my hand on the side of her face, holding her lightly while her mouth opened into mine. I loved her kisses. Every time her lips touched mine it felt like the first time all over again. I held her against me, pulling her body into mine. I didn't think anything of it but she quickly pulled away right as I let myself say, "I love you, Nancy."
"What?" This is the moment I knew I had fucked up royally. She wasn't going to say it back. Did I mean it? Oh no. Am I questioning my love for Nancy Wheeler? I do love her. I love her more than I have ever loved anyone.
"I'm sorry." I grabbed the edge of the bed and pulled myself off, running into the bathroom to avoid Nancy's reaction. I closed the door behind me and just happened to glance at my reflection in the mirror. I turned on the sink, forcing myself to splash water on my face, waking myself up. Maybe she would understand that I'm tired and I don't mean what I say and that I'm just a big ol' goof. But I did mean what I said. I meant it completely. I meant every single one of the three words I said. I love Nancy. Me. Robin Buckley loves Nancy Wheeler. I mean yeah it's early but I've known her forever. I mean it's not weird right? It wouldn't be weird if I told Steve that I loved him. Well, yes it would be. But that's only because we're bros and not dating. God, imagine if I dated Steve. We'd both be miserable. I grabbed the door handle, my hand shaking a bit. I put my head against the door as I turned it a bit, struggling to face Nancy eye to eye.
"Robin, I love you too." Her voice whispered through the door. I opened it to see Nancy, she was standing on the other side of the door, her arms wrapped around her waist as she stood quietly. I dropped my hand from the door handle and immediately grabbed her. My hands slid around her waist and threw her backwards into the bed.
"You don't think it's weird that I said you were my girlfriend and told you I love you in the same night?" I crawled over her, looking down at her as a red blush covered her cheeks.
"Well, yes, but I've been wanting to tell you since Chicago." Her voice was soft but the words still meant the same. I pushed her hair away from her face and left a kiss on her cheek, then one on her ear, one on her neck, then one on her shoulder. She leaned her head into mine and smiled, no tears in sight. "There's no denying how you feel. People love each other all the time." She took my face in her hands and rubbed my cheek, her fingers so soft against my face. I leaned my head into her hand and let her hold it up.