Flores :: Carlos Sainz

Veintitrés

"Thanks for helping me," Blanca widely smiled and looked at the newly placed shelves on the wall.

"No problem," Carlos said and wiped away the sweat on his forehead with his arm. "I forget how much effect it costs to do this."

Blanca smirked. "You're not used to doing anything."

He rolled his eyes.

"Are you gonna do anything tonight?"

"I'm going out with friends," he replied.

"As you should. You've worked hard."

"Just had a summer break and now three more weeks, it's weird. And then we're approaching the end of the season real quick," he breathed.

"Glad or disappointing?"

Carlos sat down on the sofa and took some time to think about it. "Both. I think it's realistic that this season sucks. It's better than last year, but many mistakes were made this season. From my side, the team's side. I think it's for the best to end this season quickly and focus on next year's season," he spoke up. "But on the other hand, I love to race and the million challenges of it."

"Yeah, true," Blanca said and nodded. "But hey, mum asked me over for dinner tomorrow evening. Will you be there too?"

"No?"

"Oh. Well, hereby, you're invited," she snorted and looked awkwardly at her brother. "She said it would be a family dinner."

"Minus the star himself."

Blanca rose her eyebrows and looked judgy at Carlos. "Don't ever say that again," she said. "Gosh, no."

"It's the truth." He proudly smiled.

"I will call her."

The eyes of Carlos fell on the blue sky outside. They shot at the moving plane when he heard the engines. A sigh left his mouth when he spotted an airplane. It was tiny. Probably flying at an altitude of 10.000 feet. He wondered where it departed and where it was going. Would it be a cargo flight? Would it bring people on a holiday? Work?

Shit, no.

He would relax the muscles in his face. Unnoticeably, he was squeezing his eyebrows together. Airplanes... Carlos got up and walked to the kitchen to grab a drink. But which airline will it be? No, stop. He brought the glass to his lips and took a sip while walking back to the couch. He had to stop thinking about this.

"As I mentioned before, you're invited tomorrow. Mum wanted to call you tonight," Blanca announced and scanned Carlos' face, who didn't really pay attention to her. She waved her hand in front of his face. "Earth to Carlos."

His eyes shot to her. "Hmm, what?"

"You look like you're thinking hard?"

"What?"

"You are looking like you're... Angry? Your thinking face?"

He shortly laughed. "No, it's nothing. What did mum say?"

"You're welcome tomorrow."

"Ah, lovely. Will be there," Carlos smiled. It quickly disappeared once he looked outside again. It started to feel like everything was related to her. Everywhere he looked, he would see her. Or think of her.

"There it is again. What is bothering you?"

He sighed and looked down. "She..." An embarrassing laugh rolled over his lips. "It's ridiculous," he said and he looked hopelessly at Blanca.

"She?"

"When an airplane flies over, she has to look at it. Sometimes she even grabs her phone and checks the flight radar for the flight. And every time I see a plane flying over, I have to look at it because she does it too. She thinks no one sees it, that makes it adorable," he said and looked at the next plane that flew over. "And she loves cinnamon buns. She's stubborn, likes to do everything to do her own way, and laughs when she makes a grammar mistake. She loves to play board games but also likes to discuss the news or watch Velvet. Oh, and she says she's not a basic iced coffee addict like those teenage people these days, but she adores iced coffee."

The person Carlos was talking about, meant much to Carlos. Perhaps a lot, Blanca observed. Although she didn't know about who he was talking about.

"I can't stop thinking of her and I fucked it up."

"About whom are you talking and what did you do?"

Carlos chewed on the inside of his cheek and shook his head. "Eleanor," he said. "I met her a couple of months ago. A few months after my breakup," he clarified.

"Oh, do I know her?"

He was shaking his head. "No, you don't. She's from the Netherlands, moved here to renovate a house together with her dad and... Yeah." He ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know if you remember her, but when we were in the village, at the market, you threatened to ask for a woman's Instagram because I looked at her. Or Ana."

"Uhm... I remember the situation, but I don't remember the woman."

Carlos grabbed his phone and opened his Instagram. She had an open account, so anyone could see her profile. He bit on the inside of his lip when she saw a few new posts; one with Bibi, a video on the tennis court, a photo with that guy at Zandvoort and one photo where she was looking like a professional journalist. She looked happy. And beautiful. "Anyway," he said and handed over his phone. "Don't like anything."

One look was shared before Blanca looked at the phone, of course, she wouldn't like anything. She was scrolling through her feed. "Wait, I know her. I once bumped into her when I picked up your dogs. At the entrance. She held open the door for me," she said and took a deep breath. "She is beautiful."

"I know, she is."

"So what happened?"

"We were friends. And from the beginning, she told me that she wasn't looking for a relationship. Me neither. She was pretty clear about it. But I caught feelings for her. And we stopped seeing each other often. We somehow didn't speak to each other anymore... I don't know why. So when I saw her, I told her that I needed some distance." Carlos wanted to tell the complete version of the situation, but how embarrassing would it be to say to your sister that you had FWB? This was something that you wouldn't share with your siblings.

"Oh, well, yeah. Seems reasonable, though. Is this her boyfriend?" Blanca showed the post with that guy.

He shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think so."

"How did she react? When you told her that you wanted some distance?"

"She walked away, saying something in Dutch, but I didn't see any other emotion than a smile on her face. Now I think back about it, I know it was a smile to cover something up. And when I wanted to visit her, to explain everything more, she was gone. It looked like she left. Like she dropped her stuff and went back to the Netherlands," Carlos mentioned. "And I didn't want to bother her by calling or texting her."

Blanca looked up from the phone, slightly pressing her eyebrows together and thinking hard.

"What?"

"What?"

"You're thinking something," Carlos said and waited for her reaction.

She bit her lip and nodded in agreement. "If you didn't mean anything to her, she wouldn't just walk away." It stayed silent. "I think she got hurt and had to walk away to not show her true emotions. Why didn't you tell the truth? Or ask about it?"

"It's not like I had time for that," he shot back. "And it's not something you just ask. You know how hard it was to find the courage to see her in the first place?"

"Fair." Blanca handed back the phone to Carlos. "She left. She went back to the Netherlands," she concluded, going back to the precious topic.

Carlos sighed again and looked hopelessly at his phone. "Did she run away because of this?"

"I don't know. I don't think that it is the main reason, but everyone handles it in their own way. And let's not forget that she's Dutch. Maybe she already had plans to go back."

"It's very coincidental," Carlos shot back. "¡Joder!" He got up and walked to the kitchen. "I don't know what to do. I don't want to... She was at Zandvoort. And I saw her. Out of the thousands of people there, I had to see her in the crowd. When we looked at each other, it felt like she pushed a knife into my chest. Not because I saw her with someone else - well, it did, but why should I care? It's her life - but because she was there. It just hurt me so much to see her when knowing that I lost her."