This I Promise You (a love story)

1 - The Day They Got Married

Fear. 

It was the type of fear that sent shivers through ones spine, and chilled one to their bone. The fear that made them tremble to their core. 

When Bondita first came to this mansion at the age of 10, that was exactly how she felt. 

Married to a man she didn't know; a man much older than her. 

She had to leave behind her Maa. The Maa that birthed her, fed her, bathed her, and raised her. The Maa that was her universe -- the one that she couldn't bear the thought of leaving behind... yet she had to. 

"Can I bring my Maa with me?" the 10 year old had asked Anirudh, who was sitting beside her for the sindoor dhan. 

Anirudh hadn't answered. 

He was staring at Agni, the sacred fire in front of them, which was blazing high as if it were happily showering blessings upon them. 

Bondita was far too young, far too aloof to understand the lifelessness in his eyes. 

"Answer me," she had pressed on, a little meekly, worried that she would have to leave her mother behind.

But he ignored her again.

Bondita reached for his cream colored kurta top, just by his hip, and pinched the material between her thumb and index finger. Then she pulled on it hard, causing Anirudh to nearly fall over on top of her. 

Anirudh turned his head finally, to glare at her with his intense eyes. 

Bondita gulped nervously. 

He looked angry. 

So angry.

"Y - Y - You aren't a - answering me," Bondita said, swallowing back her own saliva -- it most certainly had gone down the wrong tube, because she felt like she could have a coughing fit at any moment now. 

"What do you want me to answer?" 

His first words to her.

They came out like a snarl. A hiss. 

"M - my q - question," she had stammered back. 

"Do I look like I have any answers for you?" he shot back. 

"Y - you are b - big. B - big people have all the answers," Bondita said, trembling now. Her toes coloured with alta had curled with fear. 

"I barely have any answers for myself," Anirudh had said, and then turned to pointedly look back at the flames, "What answer can I give you?" 

He was rude. So rude! 

She didn't want him to be her husband! 

Bondita turned to find her Maa in the crowd. 

But she was nowhere to be found. 

"Where is --" she was about to ask the man sitting next to her, but she remembered his rude words and she swallowed back her words. 

She nervously looked at the Agni. The warmth of the havan was making her forehead sweat. 

It was finally time for the sindoor dhan. They had already taken their pheres. They had already done every ritual that supposedly was to be done. 

The ritual was boring and long. The whole time, she had wanted to get up and play with her friends - the other village girls. 

She hoped that she had friends in her sasural!

Anirudh's fingers were shaking as he reached for the sindoor. 

Bondita didn't look at him. She didn't understand what this meant. She didn't feel anything other than the fear that was coursing through her veins, and making her tremble in her seat.