[𝐋𝐮𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚 𝐀𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐫𝐨𝐞]
On the outside, Luella is this confident, sassy, yet kind girl. She's powerful, knows her place and where she stands. But on the inside she's tired and loosing grasp on reality. She hides her real mentality...
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| TW DEPRESSION, PANIC ATTACKS, EATING DISORDER | "Been trying hard to not get into trouble but I've got a war I'm my mind." - Lana Del Rey ❦
Life fucking sucks.
Excuse me for my mother fucking language but it really fucking does.
And let me tell you why.
The next morning when I woke up I had to leave early for me and August's study session in the library with an aching pussy and wonky legs . They were like jelly. My hair was everywhere and I was acting strange and I'm sure August knew something was up. I also has a massive ass headache after drinking all that vodka.
Hangover is a bitch.
And he also looked so fucking fine that morning that even my aching core started to yearn for his touch. And to make matters worse, we came up on a mature scene in Archers Voice so it made everything even more awkward.
Why does he have to look so fucking good all the damn time.
Buy the time I got back to my apartment building and in my room I was touching myself to the thought of him. I literally came to the thought of him. My enemy.
What the hell is wrong with me?
But you might be asking, Luella, the weekend couldn't have gotten even worse could it? Oh, but it did.
My parents called last night. Well my brother asked my parents to call last night. I love seeing his lazy smile and his little rosy, chubby cheeks. He brings me so much pride and joy. And I love my brother, I really do and I wish I could see him more often but it's my parents who I don't like. I despise them.
I spent around an hour last night talking to my brother before he had to go to sleep. Then I talked to my parents and that's when everything went down hill.
My parents talked to me about my next up coming modeling job. Yes, I model. I've been doing it since I was young with my sister and it's always been something I've enjoyed. My parents are both very well known people so of course their daughters have to be as well. Although modeling was more fun with my sister because I always had someone to have fun with and be there with.
It's a little lonely now that she's gone but I've gotten use to it. It's in a few weeks so I still have some time to kill before then.
But after that conversation, one thing lead to another and I ended up having a death like panic attack, passed out for an hour with no one there, and ended up drinking two whole bottles of whiskey.
