Time is a God and We Cannot See Her Face

PART 7

{Song: "A Gift to You" by Roo Panes}

"I may have a suggestion."

Jim had barely rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, the previous night coming back to him. He processed that yes, Spock had spent the night, yes, Jim had really just passed out before even attempting to kiss Spock goodnight, yes he'd snoozed as the little spoon to his Commander, he might have had some sort of anxiety attack but he couldn't quite remember and yes, Spock was still here, wearing just his wrinkled black slacks and black sleeveless undershirt, hair uncharacteristically ruffled and muscles altogether very distracting, drinking a cup of steaming tea as he sat cross-legged on the other side of the bed.

Oh my god. It's a fucking dream come true.

"Uh— good morning!" Jim grinned sleepily at him, rolling over onto his back and stretching the soreness of the previous day away. "An idea? Alright. Let's hear it."

"I do not know if it is wise."

Jim chuckled and scooted up til he was sitting in the bed, then clicked a toggle switch next to the nightstand and turned on some of the soft Christmas lights. "Can I at least hear the proposition before we make a judgment?"

Spock felt his resolve melting away as he beheld the sensuous sight in front of him. Kirk, the brave and bold, Starship Captain and friend, the embodiment of compassion, justice, resolve, brilliance. And he was seemingly happy to have Spock sitting in his bed. Happy to have Spock seeing him like this, rosy-cheeked with tawny hair a mess, a halo of orange light around him from the faux Yule log he'd set up.

"I do not wish to impose upon your ability to effectively communicate with me from this point forward," Spock explained. "And I am concerned that my suggestion, if brought to completion, may result in that very thing."

"And why's that?" Jim took a small bottle of pain pills from his headboard and downed one of the small tablets.

"The fullness of truth. The very weight of it, Captain, once imparted, cannot be rescinded."

Jim stared at him incredulously. His Vulcan-Human was gorgeous.

"Spock, are you referring to a mind-meld?"

"Yes. I wish for you to know my... thoughts towards you."

"Are you... are you positive that won't have any ill effects on you? A deeper meld with a human who holds such ... well, powerful emotions? Emotions regarding you?"

Spock's eyes softened toward him, for a split second touched by Jim's selflessness. "On the contrary, Captain. I believe our shared and accumulated time and thoughts in the company of one another will assist in our comfort in residing in one another's minds. And the physical contact that we have already shared..."

"... clued you in a little already?" Jim finished for him, smirking.

"I have experienced ... impressions of your feelings. Yes." His eyes turned serious, almost hungry, and it sent Jim's mouth dry. "But they are only mere shards of a larger picture, that much is clear. Additionally, you have verbalized your emotions to me. And I wish to understand further."

Jim swallowed. "Alright then. Yes. If you're positive it won't harm you, yes."

"I cannot guarantee there will not be any discomfort, Jim. But I also wish for you to see."

"You wish for me to also understand how you think— and feel — about me?"

"In total honesty."

"Fullness of truth. I got it. Yes. Yes, Spock. Nothing would please me more."