The Rampage MC #2: Beard and Emily

Chapter 10 (Emily): We Didn't Have Time

I'm an intelligent woman. Always have been. Teachers wanted me to skip grades in school, but my parents refused, insisting I remain with children my own age. They hired tutors for me to teach me math and science at grade levels higher than mine so my mind would be challenged, but they recognized that I needed to be socialized with my peers to balance out my high IQ. I thrived on learning and begged for more, but they were careful not to allow me to become so entrenched in school that I didn't have time to play and be normal, to be more than just my brain.

Despite my brains, though, I'd still fallen for Beard's charisma. Fallen victim to the man's charm and easy way, and, let's face it, that intense look in his beautiful eyes. I'd looked forward to finishing work and being able to meet him at the bar, having a night of fun with my creative and aggressive lover.

Now, he'd just told me that every time I showed up in the bar, he dropped everything and came running. Beard was not a man who came running. Women ran to him, and I suppose, in a way, that I'd been running to him by showing up at the bar. But I consoled myself that he was meeting me halfway, at least. We'd both been pursuing the other without acknowledging it, without naming it and without pushing the other for more.

If you could believe Beard, he'd wanted more as much as I did. Every time I'd shown up at the bar, every single time, he'd met me there. I never sat there alone for long. Maybe ten minutes at the most. But then Beard would come striding through the bar in either a Henley or a short sleeve, plain black T-shirt, his cut over his shirt. His eyes would search the large room for a moment then hone in on me as he came right over. He'd share a beer with me, then ask if I was ready to go. It was a short ride to the clubhouse, but I'd enjoyed every brief moment with my arms wrapped around his waist.

And then to find out he'd been searching for me since the moment I'd walked out of his clubhouse after his juvenile behavior...unbelievable.

I didn't like my life without you. For the first time in my life, I missed a woman, and not just any woman, but you. I missed you. Every time you showed up in the bar, I dropped everything and came running. Not just for the sex, either. For you, Emily. I came running for you.

But then his reaction to the news of my pregnancy at the clubhouse had shown me a different side of the man. I didn't like it. I also didn't like the response his behavior provoked in me. If I'd seen a different side of him that night, he'd seen a different side of me, too.

And it was that side that was now wary of the man, despite the words he was telling me.

For you, Emily. I came running for you.

The words were everything I would have loved to hear before the clubhouse scene. Everything that would have melted my heart before.

The twins started kicking, reminding me why he was telling me these sweet things. He'd decided he wanted to be a father, and he was being Beard -- making that happen by whatever means he needed to employ. So I needed to be smart, and I needed to be alert.

I needed to be polite and remote.

Looking straight at Beard, I smiled the smile I smiled at the families of patients. "Well, how nice of you to say that. Now, we need to make a plan for moving forward with the twins. Why don't I touch base in about a week and we can meet up and make a custody plan?"

Beard gave me a hard, assessing look, then he smiled.

"Nice try. But I'm not going away for a week, Emily. I've already been away for too long."

I kept my smile firmly in place. "Well, unfortunately, I have a very busy week ahead of me so there's no time in my schedule for a meeting."

In two steps, Beard was right in front of me. "This is not a meeting, Emily. We are two parents who need to discuss ways I can make your life easier for the last few weeks of the pregnancy. You're going to see me every single day, and I'm not giving you a choice about that. I'm going to help you every single day and unless you're at work, I'm going to be with you. That's what I call a non-negotiable."

With every dictatorial word out of his mouth, I was finding it more and more difficult to keep that smile plastered on my face. "I'm so sorry, but that's not going to possible, but I really do appreciate your concern."

He crossed his arms over his chest. "You don't want to make this a battle of wills, Emily. You'll lose."

"No battle of wills," I said, still freaking smiling. "Just the way we're going to work."

"You can be as polite as you want, Emily, but it's not going to turn out well. I won't be cut out of your life or the twins' lives."

I rubbed my hand over my belly. "No, you won't be cut out of their lives. I promise you that as long as you're really all in. But since they aren't here yet, there's no real need for you to be around right now."

"I disagree. I want to help you. So I'm going to be around."

My parents walked into my house, clearly thinking they'd given me enough time with the father of my babies. "Oh, Mom, Dad! You're just in time to say goodbye to Beard. He was just leaving."

"Bye, Almanzo," my father said.

"I'm sure we'll be seeing you soon," my mother said, smiling rather like a shark.

I walked with Beard to the front door and opened it for him. "So nice of you to stop by. I'll be in touch," I said, smiling. Of course I was smiling. I was going to smile at this man until my facial muscles froze.

"This little act isn't going to keep me away," he said to me, warning in his tone.

"No act," I said, smiling. "This is me being pleasant so we can co-parent successfully. That's all. We have time to figure things out, and I just thought it would go better if we were nice to one another. Pleasant. For the sake of the twins."

"We'll be pleasant to each other for the sake of each other," he said. "We both want the same thing, Emily. You're just afraid -- and no wonder considering how I acted -- to admit it. But I'm going to make it so you feel safe admitting it very soon."

"Co-parenting," I told him...with a polite smile. "That's my final offer, Beard. Nothing more than that."

"Now that I have your number, I'll be able to keep in touch when I'm not actually with you." 

We'd exchanged phone numbers earlier after Beard had insisted on it. "I have time to change your mind before the twins arrive, and I plan to."

But he was wrong. We didn't have time.