Support System x Gavi

Do You Get Deja Vu?

(TW talk of death and dead bodies)

It has been a week since I told to boys what happened. I don't regret telling them, but now they are way more alert when they are around me. For instance two days ago I stubbed my toe. Typically this is a dumb thing that everyone does, but the boys ran over to me and started comforting me way more than needed. I had to smile, but it has been getting annoying. Gavi and Pedri both walk me to my door no matter what now and Ferran and Pablo Toree walked me to my office every morning. I haven't really cried since then, I think I cried all the tears in the world that night.

Josh left a couple of days ago, but before he left Xavi pulled him aside and told him how well he did. Pedri ended up driving him to the airport. "These guys like you. I can tell" josh says turning around to face me "if you can't be at home with us, I am glad you are here with this big family" I smiled and pulled him into a hug. He turned the other way and walked into the airport. I wasn't as sad as I thought I would've been.

*

It had been a long week, it was Friday night and Mikky and Sira invited me out. After everything that happened last time I went out with them I decided not to go. So there I was sitting on my couch watching my favorite show, The Middle. My mom and I would watch it when it was still live on TV, but now it was me in a quiet apartment watching it by myself. I had fully shut down my phone because I just wanted time away from the outside world. It was around 8:30 and for some reason my eyes were closing and my body was slumping down. "BANG BANG BANG" I hear a loud and firm knocking on my door. I stand up slowing and walk over to it. I looked through the peephole to see a scared Gavi standing there. I pull the door open and yawn. Right when he saw me he pulled me into a tight hug. "gavi what is going on?" I say growing concerned " is everything ok?" He doesn't speak for many moments, he just holds me, honestly I felt like he was never going to let go. When he finally does I see that there are tears in his eyes. "Gavi?" I asked even more concerned. "Mikky and Sira were in a bad car accident on the way to the club they were going to tonight" he looks sad "they were both rushed to hospital and are doing okay, but I thought you were with them and when I never got word that you were okay too. I freaked out and called you. You didn't pick up so I came over here." A tear runs down my cheek. I pull Gavi back into a hug. We had been standing there for a while when I hear Pedro's voice,"bro you said you would text me when you found out what happened." We both turn to look at him. I rush to Pedri and pull him into a hug. He freezes up, but then hugs me back after a moment. Me, still silent, walks into my apartment and grabs my phone and keys before, again still silent, turning to lock my door. I start to walk down the hallway and they follow me confused. We all get in the elevator and ride it down. When we get to the parking lot they start to walk to their car, but I don't follow. I walk the other direction to my car. I get in and drive off.

After a 10 minute drive that felt like it lasted for a thousand years, I pulled up to the hospital and parked. I had tears in my eyes, but was holding them back really well. I walk through the sliding doors into the ER waiting room and my eyes fall on Frenkie, Ferran, Pablo Toree, and Balde. "I must have beaten Pedri and Gavi to the hospital" I think to myself and start to make my way over to the distraught boys. When they see me they stand up and I hug both Frenkie and Ferran with tears in my eyes. We sit down and a nurse walks out. We all turn our attention to her. "It was a drunk driver that was leaving the club they were going to-" the nurse says, but I stop listening. I Look past her to see Gavi and Pedri walk in. When I make eye contact with Gavi. I start to feel myself getting light headed, I try to shake it off, it doesn't work and everything goes black.

4 months ago

I ran into the police station, with a frantic look on my face. Two officers stand up and take their hats off with a sad look on their faces. They walk over to me and start to talk,"we need to go to the hospital so you can identify their bodies" I am crying so hard, but I am able to move my legs and follow them out and into the back of a car.

We pull up to a back door of the hospital and I hop out. There is a nurse standing there. She sees us and walks over,"they were hit by a drunk driver leaving a club" she says sounding like she is talking to me, but I can tell she is talking to the officers. We walked through a door and into a cement room with three tables covered with one white sheet. She looks at me and says "I am going to lift the sheets one by one and you tell me who these people are" . I nod, it was just like a movie. She does the first one "my sister Caroline" I say with no emotion. We walk to the second one. She lifts it "my dad Peter" I say, then before she lifts the last one I blurt out "my mom angel" she nods not letting me see my mom. She thanks us and we walk out.

Present

I wake up, it is cold where I am but I feel two warm hands on me. I open my eyes to see that I am in fact laying in a hospital bed too. Gavi had his hand on one of mine and Pedri had his hand on the other one. They were asleep so I used my nose to press the nurse call button. She walks and smiles. Then shifts her attention to the monitors. "You got light headed" she says "have you had any significant head trauma in the last couple of months?" She asks and I think back to the time, 2 moths ago, when I hit my head on the wall. I tell her, but she doesn't seem concerned. I thank her as she leaves to get my discharge papers and brings me my clothes. I let go of their hands and started to stand up. The shifting woke up Pedri. He sits up and just stares at me concerned as I put on my actual clothes. The nurse comes back and just tells me to come back if I faint again. Pedri and I thank her. I tap Gavi and he jolts up. Jump scaring both Pedri and I. He smiles when he sees me awake and without any words we all walk out. I go to my car and Gavi insists on staying the night with me tonight to make sure everything is ok.

We showed up at my house. It was a little past midnight and I hopped into the shower. I get out and throw some pjs on. I then open the door and fall into bed. I forgot that Gavi was there because when I fell into bed I felt arms pull me backwards, I got scared, until I was up against a chest. I lay with my eyes wide open staring at the wall in my room. I feel him shift as he sits up to turn the lamp off. Once it is dark, he kisses the side of my head. I close my eyes. I thought it would be hard to sleep, but with Gavi's arms around me I was so comfortable that I fell into dreams almost instantly.