Spιɴoғғ Seαѕoɴ | ᴮᵉʸᵇˡᵃᵈᵉ ᴮᵘʳˢᵗ ᴼⁿᵉˢʰᵒᵗˢ

- ᴛᴏ sᴀʏ ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ [ ʟᴜɪ ]

— angst, sickness, flashback —

———

"...WE SHOULD BREAK UP."

Lui's eyes shit up from his lunch, making eye contact with his luncheon companion sat still in front of him.

To his surprise, Y/N wore a cloak of melancholy on their face, a dreaded atmosphere around their entire individual. The current mask was a change—and not a good one—from their usual snarky and nimble one.

Lui straightened his neck up, setting his fork down.

He planted a firm elbow on the table they ate at.

"Why do you want to break up?" his tone was laced with hints of aggravation. "You don't like me anymore?"

Y/N's leg bounced up and down beneath the table, legs tense and fingers curled.

They inhaled sharply, then replied.

"I like you...it's just..." they paused for a moment, trying to find all the words appropriate for a time like this.  Y/N curled their lips inwards, softly biting down.  "...I don't want you to carry the pain that comes with it."

       "So you want to break up for my sake?"

       "...essentially."

Lui shook his head in an impatient manner, as if he had heard this all before. 

       "Listen, Y/N—and listen well because I am not gonna repeat myself again," he waved his fork back and forth in the air.  "getting in a relationship with you was a decision I made knowing all the risks that came with it.  I don't want your warnings, I just—" Lui stabbed his fork into his food. "I just want to like you and...enjoy this."

Y/N only stared at their food, occasionally poking it around with a spoon.

"Besides, you've already casted your little charms on me." Lui rolled his eyes, taking a bite out of his food. "I can't change anything about my feelings now, can I?"

"...are you sure you want to stay?" they murmured in confirmation.

"I.  Like.  You." Lui stated again with emphasis, spinning his fork around.

       The one sat across from them gazed down.

       "Y/N L/N, look at me." they tilted their head up.  Lui's eyes were narrowed and irritated.

       "I like you more than I've liked anyone before—and I don't like people.  This is all new to me and I am not just gonna let it slip away like that as if I'm some sort of dimwit.  I want to spend the rest of my life with you and your dolt self."

       Lui munched with an attitude on his lasagna.  "...is there any more room for contradiction?"

Y/N wiped away the coming tears at the corners of their eyes.  "...I like you too, Lui."

He swallowed his bite.  A tug at the corner of his mouth peeked out.  "I'm glad to hear that."

His pale, frosty fingers curled over his the dark material of his shirt where his heart lays, nails digging in deep.

Lui had just received the message he was apprehending.

In the middle of a national match on stage just a city away, he heard a ping from his phone—the ping specifically set for Y/N so he knew it was them—and instantaneously glanced over to check what they had sent.

Except the message was not written by Y/N.

The message was from the hospital.

He dropped everything instantly.

Lui forfeited the match that day—he had to, or else he couldn't leave. He took the next train back to Fukuoka right after checking out of his room in a scurrying state. A murky pool of dismal formed beneath his lungs.

He just hoped the worst hadn't come just yet.

It was...too soon.

Y/N laid silently on the bed, their warm breathing fogging through the ventilator signaled that they were still with him.

At least in this moment.

Lui pulled up a chair right next to his partner, back against the window

He ran his other set of fingers over their arm slowly, eventually holding it gently and giving it a squeeze.

They were still warm, but for how much longer?

This isn't fair.

Lui's mind spat out so many, so many vindictive things about their illness in his head that Y/N would cry if they ever heard them.

He knew what he was getting himself into.

But this just can't be their time yet.

Lui gripped Y/N's hand gently, slowly shaking his head as the possible outcomes all generated like a swirl of electricity through his brain.

"Y/N, are you seriously gonna leave me like this?" he mutters. His thumb ran over their cheek—they were pale, purplish in some areas almost due to circulation.

He didn't want them to leave yet.

They had made so many plans, so many places they were going to venture.

What was he going to do with all of them now?

"If I lose my battle, stay alive for me okay?  You were the reason why I stayed just a bit longer.  I'll forever watch over you."

Lui recalled the words of his partner and sat there in solemn.

Y/N is bound to slip away in the very near future. He didn't want to accept it, but it would be stupid to push away something that is fated to come right before his eyes.

Lui bit the insides of his lower lip.

He smacked his face on both sides with both hands, trying to shake himself out of that trance and to make sure no tears were spilt.

'I...I have to at least say goodbye before they're gone for good.'

Running a hand over Y/N's head, fingers sliding through their fragile strands of hair—Lui could no longer restrain the fall of grief unleashing within his soul.

"...thank you, Y/N." he shook his head slowly side to side.  "Thank you for spending the rest of your life with me."

'You're a mistake that I will never regret.'

———