The Rings of Salammis

Salammis - Part 3

     Thomas was glad for the quiet interlude. Memories of another life, someone else's life, were crowding into his head faster and faster and it was becoming difficult to ignore them enough to do his job. He desperately needed someone to talk it over with, and so after watching the ring for a few minutes to make sure nothing else was going to happen he left the bridge and headed for Matthew's cabin. Surely Matthew must be off duty by now. He had to be.

     He was. He had removed his uniform and was sitting on the edge of his cot in his underclothes trying, without much success, to scrub the paint from his arms and hands. A couple of drips had fallen on his face as well, and a sticky patch of hair on the back of his head was the result of his having inadvertently backed into a freshly painted strut. The streaky smears resulting from the soldier's attempts to cleanse himself made him look as if he were suffering from some terrible disease.

     He was cursing under his breath as Thomas pushed the door wider open, using words he must have picked up from older, embittered army veterans, and Thomas laughed despite his fear and uncertainty. "Gods, Matt! You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

     Matthew's reply was an even more emphatic oath. "Can't get the bloody stuff off!" he complained, displaying his only weapon to the amused wizard; a large bar of hard green soap. "This stuff is bloody useless! What are we doing painting the bloody ship anyway? We're soldiers, not decorators! You know the worst part?" he asked as Thomas came in and sat down beside him. "As Wing Leader I have to tell the others to get on with it and not complain! Bloody chain of command! While inside I'm cursing and complaining even more than they are!"

     "The burden of responsibility," smiled Thomas. "The loneliness of command. They say it's tough at the top."

     "I wish I'd never accepted promotion," moaned the soldier, staring down at his soap lathered, paint stained hands. "I was happy as a common cavalryman. I was one of the lads, you know? Now I catch it from both sides. It's not as if there's anyone of my own rank I can chum around with. If I was with a big unit there'd be other Wing Leaders around. How in bloody hell did I get landed with this job?"

     "Because you're good," the wizard replied earnestly. "Those above you know you're good and those below you know you're good. Back on the Hummingbird I heard the men talking about you behind your back, and a couple of times I overheard Saturn reporting back to Lexandria. The consensus of opinion is that you're damned good at your job. That's why you're here."

     Matthew stared at him in astonishment, then hurriedly averted his eyes in embarrassment. "I'm sorry," he said. "You didn't come here to hear me griping. It's just that you're the only person aboard this ship I can sound off to. Sorry."

     Thomas put a hand on his arm. "All part of the job. Let's make a deal. You tell me all your problems and I'll tell you mine. Deal?"

     "Deal," agreed Matthew with a grin, "but I can't believe you've got any problems. A fantastic wife, a great son. A whole valley full of wizards who think you're the dog's gobblers..."

     Thomas stood and crossed the room to stand by the doorway and stared out into the corridor. "What is it?" asked Matthew, hurriedly rinsing his hands off and drying them on a towel before getting up to stand beside him. "You've got a problem? Something you want to talk about?"

     "Not a problem," replied Thomas, not turning to face him. "Not as such. It's those false memories I've been having. They're coming faster and faster now. A whole lifetime of memories. You remember the sister? The blonde sister?" Matthew nodded. "I remember her from my earliest childhood to the day she... was lost. I remember every birthday party. Every trick she ever played on me, I mean him. I remember her first boyfriend, a young man from a neighbouring homestead, coming to visit her. I remember walking into the barn to catch the two of them stark naked together, how she warned me not to tell father. Telling me she'd rip me apart if I did. I remember every illness she ever had. Every game we ever played together. Every joy, every despair... I remember everything, Matt. Everything about her! It's as if I really had a sister. The sister I never had."