7 things I learnt in high school

11/9:12:03

The Fourth Lesson - Slovenliness Is Three Minutes Away From Death

I was sat by the tree, the one with the apples and the softer bark, the one with the names of past and present students carved into the wood with compass needles.
Y'know, the one everyone forgot about. Must've been less than ten degrees.
Joshua was there, and all the apples were rotten by then, even the flies wouldn't touch them.

I was half-arsedly reading something about geography, something about lava and molten rock so I could feel warmer and try to get my brain to function.
He was drinking Monster and writing notes to organise another secret sleepover in the cattle field. I thought of Joshua as a son/father. He was charming and made the bark sweeter.
The book wasn't helping so I wrapped my tie around my neck as a scarf, my fingers shaking. It didn't look cold but the air was uneasy and shook the tree as it whistled.

The school building loomed in the foreground of my vision, but both it and all the things to come felt three-thousand miles away. Break had just begun and the bells didn't need to ring.
I pulled tighter on the scarf but I didn't feel warmer. Joshua said to me that if I yanked any harder that I would hang myself and that wouldn't be any bloody good. I said to him that I couldn't be arsed with the future and all of its responsibilities.
He turned around, letting his scrap of paper fall to the ground. He said to me that I should think about what I want to do when school ends.

I told him I didn't know. I told him school was like a metaphorical prison that had gotten too real too quickly. I told him that he should forget about me and finish organising that stupid trip to the field.
He smiled, maybe, and picked up his paper.
I wasn't paying attention to him by that point. My ears were screaming with dread and my mouth wasn't listening. The bell had just rung.

What the hell are they playing at, I exclaimed. It's only been three minutes and now I have to walk all the way back to school.
Joshua picked up the book I'd skimmed through. He told me that he'd cover for me in class by making up some shitty story or excuse for me. He said that I'd better be along quickly so I didn't get into trouble.

He started walking away. I started thinking about following, and about what I was going to do with myself.
College was a scam. Not enough qualification for the time investment, and the local campus was a dumping ground.
Uni was a slog. Too much qualification for the time investment and the local campus were a bunch of pompous arseholes. I asked Joshua if he really was going to cover for me after everything that happened.

He shouted at me - When have I ever not fulfilled my promises or broken my gospel word?
That was the last thing Joshua ever said to me.