i was not entirely obsessive during the time i wrote this but definitely still was a little bit, dont romanticize this thank you
STOP HE MASK KISSED MY SILLY COW 9/11 IM SCREAMING I LOVE HIM SM SORRY 😭😭 IM GONNA SHOOT MYSELF IN THE HEAD 236 TIMES WITH A BB GUN IF HE SAYS ANY KIND WORDS TO ME SOBS 7 YOUR GOOFY SPELT NAME MAKES ME GIGGLE BUT BRO YOU R JUS CUTE IN GENERAL YOU PICKLE ASS BITCH I LOVE YOU SM I JUST WANNA STAB YOU TO DEATH AAAAHH
IM SO HAPPY HE DOESNT LOOK SAD TODAY YAYAYAY ALSO HES ACTING A LITTLE GAY HE GRABBED THIS GUYS JAW AND CARESSED HIS HAIR LMAOO I LOVE HIM HES SO FUCKING SILLY AND CUTE AND FUNNY AND NORMAL ITS SO HARD TO THINK ABOUT HIM WITHOUT SMILING HES JUST URGRH I RLLY WANT HIM TO ASK TO HAVE MY COW FOR A DAY OR SMTHN LIKE YES YOU CAN PLS JUST ASK 🙏🙏🙏
i saw him in the morning hes so cute ❤️❤️
I DIDNT WRITE MUCH AB HIM YESTERDAY BUT OMGG HES SO NICE I LOVE DANNY PHANTOM AAAAHHHHH I TRIED TO GET HIM TO HOLD MY STUFFED ANIMAL UNTIL ORCHESTRA BUT MY SON INLAW KEPT TAKING HIM CRYING BUT ANYWAY HES WEARING A BRIGHT GREEN JACKET HES LIKE A PICKLE MAN I HATE PICKLES BUT I LOVE HIM HES SO ADORABLE
THEYRE BOTH HERE TODAY BUT ANYWAY I SAW 7 AND AAAAHHHH I CANT HES JUST SO SWEET MAN I LOVE HIM SO GOD DAMN MUCH I CANT TYPE FAST BC MY HANDS ARE FUCKING FREEZING BUT HES SO COOL AND PERFECT AND HANDSOME AND FUNNY AND EVERYTHING I JUST LOVE HIM MAN 😭😭im really upset rn for no reason but he looks rly cute rn even w my glasses off ❤️he also mask kissed almost all my stuffed toys :D
HES SITTING BEHIND ME ALSO MY LIPS R SO COLD FOR SOME REASON
didnt go to school today but i had a dream about him AND IT WAS SO CUTEE HE IS SO CUTE OMG HE LIKE GRABBED MY HANDS AND HELD THEM UP TO HIS FACE LIKE HE WAS HIDING HIS FACE W MY HANDS AND IT FELT SO REAL I COULD FEEL THE HEAT FROM HIS FACE ON MY HANDS AAAHHHH AND WHEN HE STOPPED BC SOMEONE WAS COMING HE WAS SOO RED IM CRYING I USUALLY CANT REMEMBER PEOPLES FACES ENOUGH TO DREAM ABOUT THEM AND EVEN IF I TRIED TO I COULDNT PICTURE HIS FACE NOW BUT IN THE DREAM I PICTURED HIM PERFECTLY HE WAS SO CLOSE TO REALITY I COULD MISTAKE IT FOR SO
something i wrote about him :)
i love him so much this feeling is so strange its the mixture of hatred for love and love itself i want so badly for him to have never existed in the first place for him to have never been born but also if he had never been born i would have nobody to love like this whether he does or doesnt love me matters not all that matters is that i allow myself to feel this way about him he is one of the most loved people of mine i dont care if he doesnt want to be mine i am okay with admiring his beauty and kind personality from afar if he is no longer comfortable with dating if he is afraid of love i will wait no matter how long it is it could be years and i will continue to wait for him he is a never ending love of my life no matter how hard i may try to rid him of my life no matter how many times i say i hate him how many times i say in detail how i wish to kill him it is all at fault i am just scared of this feeling this deep wish for attachment and validation from him i am scared to love others but no matter how hard i try to hate him he will always be there stuck with me attached like my skin and the frame to my glasses i hate him so much i just want to marry him i love him so much i want to stab him to death the only one i love he is so precious so dear to me that id do anything to have him my head wont listen to my heart it never has it just needs to learn that my heart can make a few decisions itself but my brain wants complete control over everything its so idiotic everyone should get a turn whether it hurts or not i want to be able to love him without feeling disgusting or selfish about it his hair his smile his eyes his nose everything just looks as sweet as his personality its insane i couldnt even like him just for his looks if i wanted to his personality perfectly matches his looks he has such kind eyes a sweet and slightly energized smile a nice calm voice and the cutest breathy laugh ever hes just perfect inside and out i want him to like me but what am i to do if he does id be too scared to do anything about it im a little abandoned blind crying kitten on the side of the road when it comes to decision making let alone love im more fragile than my mothers ego its insane hes driving me insane now we are both driving me to insanity its so silly i want this to go on forever but maybe he is just leading me on but i dont care i still find it sweet and as i mentioned i am very fragile so i wouldnt be able to confess myself so either he would have to do it or ask me if i like him im still thinking about that dream where he buried his face in my hands and was very warm against them and when he lifted his head he was redder than ever it was so cute and adorable i hope i get to overcome my fear of looking people in the eye so i can see it i think about when he cornered me i wonder if he saw how red i was i know i was blushing i do that so easily i never really thought about it but i am very easily flustered since i am very fragile it just makes sense and he probably knows exactly how to make me the most flustered or something because why would he corner me you know and why would he try to hug me and say sorry im so scared of him he scares me i love him i really do want a hug from him im comfortable with them now so i want one please just give me a hug im so lonely and touch starved the most hopeless romantic this world has ever seen i fall for dorks all of the time but this dork i cant get rid if just leave me alone please i tried this before but it didnt work why wont this work anymore i love you i love you so much i hate you please just hug me im scared of you please
i wanna appreciate him rn but im so fucking exhausted rn not bc i stayed up late im just tired of people rn i need to like idk recharge anyway didnt mean to make this a vent i still love him im just too tired to do anything I SAID "oh bye too" I FEEL SO DUMB IF HE REMEMBERS THAT IM KILLING MYSELF HAHAHAHHA BC I WAS SAYING BYE TO MY BSF IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD AND THEN LOOKED AT HIM FOR A SECOND AND SAID THAT THEN RAN OFF BC TTHE BELL WAS GONNA RING IM GONNA SOBBBB
IM GONNA DIE HOW DO I COMFORT PEOPLE HELP ME I WANNA COMFORT HIM BUT HOW TF DO I DO THIISSSS NOOO I LOVE YOU 7 IM JUST SO BAD AT COMFORTING
I had another dream about him help it was so scary 😿😿 EVERYONE I TALKED TO ABOUT HIM KEPT TELLING ME HE LIKED ME AND I WAS BLUSHING SO HARD AND PANICKING UHRGRHAJA AND THEN I WOKE UP IT WAS SO SAD BRO SHE KEEPS TALKING TO HIM LIKE PLEAAASE I HAVE NO FRIENDS ALSO PLS JUST I DONT WANNA SEE HIM ITS TOO SCARY AAAA I LOVE HIM
im helping someone else get with him haha it actually hurts really bad 🙁 and ill cry myself to sleep if they do end up together but i wont interfere or anything im literally helping her but yk hahaha im also ignoring him atm its been going on for 2 days and im gonna try to go as long as possible until he stops trying to talk to me or until feb 20th and then ill talk to him again even if they end up together i just hope hes happy with her and they treat each other well bc id genuinely like to see him happy with someone ❤️
still ignoring hiiimmm i feel like he might give up soon which is a little sad bc its only been 2 days but i really want to talk to her bc uhh idk shes my bsf?? anyway he just left her alone i think i can go talk to her now
OK SO LIKE HES JUST REALLY CUTE AND SILLY AND DORKY AND HIS FACE IS SO CUTE AND ITS WEIRD BECAUSE I CAN KIND OF REMEMBER HIS FACE SINCE I USUALLY CANT REMEMBER ANYONES BUT IDK HIS EYES HIS NOSE URGG GTG RHRH ITS JUST ALL SO PERFECT SO CUTE HIS HAIR IS JUS DORKY TO THE DORK I HATE HIM UGRHRHJ AND OMG HIS LAUGH ITS SO CUTE AND SILLY UGH HE HAS THIS SILLY BREATHY LAUGH THAT I COULD LISTEN TO ALL DAMN DAY OH MY GOD I DONT CARE IF WE NEVER DATES IF I NEVER EVEN CROSS HIS MIND AT ALL I JUST WANT TO ADMIRE HIS DORKINESS FROM AFAR I WANT TO JUST HEAR HIM HAVING FUN WITH HIS FRIENDS BECAUSE THATS ALL I WANT I DONT NEED TO BE HAPPY WITH HIM I JUST NEED HIM TO BE HAPPY I NEED TO SEE HIS CUTE LITTLE SMILE AND HEAR HIS CUTE LITTLE LAUGH AND PRETEND TO SLEEP JUST TO LISTEN TO HIM HAVE FUN I HATE HIM OH MY GOD I WISH HE WOULD JUST COLLAPSE BUT OH GOD HOW I LOVE HIM HOW I WANT JUST A HUG FROM HIM I WOULD DO ANYTHING HES PERFECT HES SO FUCKING ADORABLE ITS UTTERLY INSANE I HOPE HE DISAPPEARS FROM EXISTENCE BECAUSE EVERYTIME I HEAR HIS LAUGH OR SEE HIS SMILE I GO RED HES SO GOD DAMN PERFECT HELP
