Wait

Love, Evelyn.

Chapter 1

Steven...

I seriously do not want my verdict tonight to affect your day, tomorrow, and days to come....and I also feel like I worded my feelings wrong...so let me re-word them.

I understand that you love me and I have crushed your fantasies to a million pieces...

I want you to know that I find it extremely hard to identify my emotions cause I'm a damaged property.

I sincerely feel no extra emotional attachment to you...

I see you more as a friend than as a "potential" boyfriend and I know that you want to take our friendship to the next level but I'm not mentally ready for that to happen

I can't even detect my fears but I know I can trace them down to my parent's toxic marriage, my one in numerous sexual assaults and so many other traumatic events and happenings I witnessed as a child, teenager, and young adult.

I don't love you now doesn't mean I would love you later...I just don't know when "later" is....if you understand what I mean.

I could still love you in the long run but it's not now and I don't want you to wait for me to change.

if you eventually meet a better girl, go for her.

if you decide to wait till I "come around" that's fine but don't apply any form of pressure...

I know myself, if it's something I desire I would come running to it.

Love

Evelyn