Allegiant Alternate Ending

Chapter 61

Tris

Tobias and I doze in an out throughout the night, neither one of us wanting to move. At the moment I'm awake and alert and he is sleeping. As I watch him I feel a pang of sadness as I realize that physically we really don't match. He is big, strong and so very good looking - I'm small, pale, and now scarred too. The way he looked at me last night though, it's easy to believe that he really does think I'm beautiful.

I run over the conversations we had in my head. I believe he was serious when he said he'd be asking me to marry him soon. I try to picture myself married, but the thought of it scares me. Not that I don't love him, I do with all my heart, it just seems so fast.

In Abnegation being married by eighteen is very common, and I'm almost seventeen. Maybe I wouldn't feel so scared if we had known each other as we were growing up, but Marcus kept him hidden away so he never had a chance to make any kind of connections with people.

I continue to watch him as he sleeps and I begin to think of how our relationship has evolved over the past few months. It's amazing to think how far we've come, and I'm so glad this is new to both of us. We've both learned along the way about how to be in a relationship with someone.

Tobias suddenly wakes up and catches me staring at him. He begins to kiss me, and I kiss him back with fervor. Our shirts are still off from when we went to bed and our hands begin roaming over each other's skin. Thinking of everything we've been through and knowing we came out the other side makes me brave.

My hands are shaking, but they start to explore even more of him, and I hear him gasp.

"Tris, what are you doing?" He looks frightened and I remind myself it's new for him too, I'm not the only one who's nervous.

"Treading the line between 'want' and 'wise'." I look at him and raise my eyebrows to ask if he's ok with this. When he kisses me I know he wants this too.

I don't really know what I'm doing, but when he sighs my name I know it must be ok. He looks like he's having a hard time gathering his thoughts, "Are you sure you want to do this? It doesn't frighten you?"

I think for a second because I want to make my answer as honest as possible, "It does a little, but in a good way."

He kisses me some more and every sigh, moan or whisper of my name against my lips registers deep within me. The next thing I know is his hands start slowly exploring me too. He's hesitant though, to make sure I'm ok with this. I trust him with my life, so I should also trust him with my love.

I pull back for a second because I want to tell him "yes" but the look of love and lust in his eyes renders me speechless, so I can only nod.

His hands begin to move some more and a moan escapes my own lips. It's scary to be with him like this, but in a good way. The thrill of adrenaline makes it even better.

We continue to kiss and explore and I can't believe the strength of the feelings I have for this man. Obviously what we're doing feels physically good, but it also fills my heart with joy. He is mine forever, and unlike before, when the thought of marriage scared me, I now look forward to him keeping his promise that it won't be long before he asks.

************************************
Is something wrong with this chapter?? It looks like no one wants to read past it!!!