Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
|07.| ︻╦╤─ ҉ -¨ * ‧₊˚*♡ * *" ♡. ♡
.
You'd think that night I kissed Randy I'd feel good but no matter how much I tried, I couldn't bring myself to actually feel anything for Randy. I mean, I love him, but it's like the love you have for someone who's always been there, not "love love". In the moment I just wanted to feel something anything even if it messed everything up.
"Ashley...are you listening?" My therapist's voice cuts through the fog of my mind, his pen tapping a steady rhythm.
I blink away the haze. "I'm sorry... I guess I got kinda lost there."
"We were talking about your plans for Halloween," he prompts me, and I can't help but pause. Halloween used to be magical, something my mom and I shared. We'd dress up in our matching costumes and own the night. But since the world turned upside down, I haven't found the heart to celebrate it. The masks I wear every day now are enough of a costume for me.
"I don't really have any," I say he nods his head, putting his pen and board down. "you know I'm not going to force anything on you but Ashley you've been doing so well lately, please, don't let this day force you back into your isolation I really encourage you to have fun, go out, dress up." he says. "I hear ya, doc." I look at the clock. "Can I head out now? First period starts soon. "
"Of course, don't overwork yourself today. " I nod getting my things "yeah yeah see ya later. "
ఌ︎ꨄ︎
Stepping outside, seeing Randy in his dad's old pickup truck smiling at me. I smile back walking to him.
He rushes over, gentlemanly as ever, opening the door and making sure I'm settled before hopping into the driver's seat himself. "You're okay?" he asks, and I can only nod, managing a "Yes, I'm fine, thank you, Ran." His smile doesn't waver as he starts the truck, but the silence that follows wraps around us like a thick fog.
I can feel his glances, quick and concerned, as if my words are the keys to unlock this silence. But what can I say? My mind is a tangled mess of thoughts I'm not ready to unravel.
"Hey Ran...thanks for picking me up," I finally say, offering a fleeting smile. His response is immediate, "Of course, anything for you." But the air between us is still heavy, filled with unsaid words.
