Black Ice

xviii

eighteen | ishaan

The studio felt empty. Even with all four of us there.

As antagonizing and competitive as the dude could be, Crucial was a presence that was much needed on the tour. Now he's gone. Just like that.

It was hard to believe, even as we were experiencing it. All I could do was shake my head at the thought. Maybe if he'd spent less time arguing and making enemies, he wouldn't have been booted off the tour. Shit, maybe Ceeze would've let him stay, if he had respect for the dude. But Crucial was so set on being anti-social and only kickin' it with Ice and Cris, Ceeze didn't even know him enough to give him leeway.

And once you give a nigga leeway— especially one you don't know nor respect— they start taking your courtesy for cowardice. A nigga like Crucial definitely would've taken advantage of that.

He was grimy like that, always lookin' to one-up somebody over any minute thing. As aggravating as it was, I don't know if I would've kicked him off the tour. His hunger and his passion for hip-hop was enough to earn my respect, but his audacity to step to Ceeze without fear and without backup would've gotten him knighted with near admiration.

It was a stupid move— shit, probably a move I would've made, in another life— but I had to respect it.

And even though the end result wasn't pretty, I think, in a way, he earned Ceezar's respect too.

He earned a one-way ticket back home right alongside that newfound regard.

Cris insisted on having a group meeting the day that Crucial left. It was a nuisance for me, initially. It was the first day of our break; why were we even talking about the group, let alone having a meeting?

It was then that she recounted everything about what led to Crucial's demise, from the club to her solemn goodbye. Tony filled in the gaps of the squabble, detailing the damage done to Crucial in the club.

While I wished I could've seen everything play out, Crystal took over the conversation, explaining that the point of our meeting was about more than just trading gossip. It was to stay ahead of the curb. With Crucial gone, we could take advantage of his time slot and expand our setlist.

So, we brainstormed and moved songs around. We switched and swapped, pitched and passed on song after song until we finally drafted up something worth performing.

We had rehearsal right in my suite, and by the time the day was over, I.V. had a whole new game plan for the remainder of the tour.

We enjoyed the rest of our break and our loved ones. Once they were sent back home with bittersweet goodbyes, it was time to get our heads back in the game for the second half of the tour. While the tour buses were loaded up, our tour manager gathered up all the acts in the lobby.

"As some of you have probably heard or noticed, Crucial is no longer on the tour."

The formal announcement shocked no one. After all, there weren't many of us on the tour, so any type of news would zip through the crew like lightning.

Questions were laid to rest with a spiel about our conduct on tour and how violence wouldn't be tolerated.

My groupmates called bullshit, made evident by the glances they exchanged.

I only scoffed, what did they know anyway? Tony didn't even know Ceezar to have any malice toward him, and he didn't even like Crucial enough to be taking his side on any matter. Meanwhile, Crystal was just mad that her little buddy would have to face the consequences of his actions.