ENSIGN (A Starship Hope Prequel)

CHAPTER 8

Dana expected her father to make a scene in front of the rest of the bridge crew over her late arrival. Instead, he was colder to her than he'd been on her first day.

Not knowing what to make of it, she addressed Lieutenant Commander Davis, who'd been advising her.

"Um, sorry I'm late. I'm prepared to serve in the mess during lunch."

Davis turned his chair to face her. She saw a hint of annoyance in the slight twist of his lips. "That's not necessary. The captain already informed me you might be late today. Let's get started."

Dana's eyes flew to her father, but he avoided her gaze. To everyone else, he seemed to be focusing on something at his console, but she knew him too well to fall for the façade. It didn't matter either way. The pit in Dana's stomach eased now that the worst of her morning seemed to be over.

"We're launching in a few hours," Commander Davis said, drawing her attention back his way. "I want to go over the take-off procedures before we lift off."

"Of course–wait..." Understanding dawned on her at last. "You want me to perform the launch?"

"Yes. There won't be many other opportunities for you to practice this, as we won't be landing the ship again until we return."

Again, Dana's eyes flew to her father, but he continued to pretend he couldn't hear them, his back turned.

"I can't."

"Why not? You're at the top of your graduating class. Why do you think you're on the bridge?"

He was right. And this was her chance, where she could prove to herself and her father that she could do this once and for all. The ground crew would have to admit that she wouldn't require retesting if she was able to pilot the starship on her own.

Dana looked at her father's back once again.

Was this his plan all along?

❖

Dana couldn't eat. Her stomach danced with butterfly wings every time she considered what she was about to do. The exciting part of it all would be finally going up on a deep space mission with her father like she'd always dreamed. The other, dread-inducing part was that this flight would be her re-test. Regardless of what the rest of the crew thought they knew–or didn't know–this was an exhibition. If she failed here, in front of everyone, she'd probably never get the chance to pilot a starship again.

Ground control began the count, and Dana ran her clammy hands down the front of her pants again. She sat, keeping her legs still and her eyes on the viewscreen as they began tilting the ship at an upward trajectory. The blue-green sky, studded with patches of clouds, came into view. The clock was down to one minute before launch.

Down below, the ground crews cleared the dock for their takeoff. Dana didn't want to, but she thought of Kristoff. She hadn't run into him again since that first day. Had he found any joy in his assignment? She might have asked him, might have sought him out, but she'd convinced herself that with everything going on, there just hadn't been time to reach out to him.

The truth was, she couldn't face him. The cadets who'd tormented her over the years at the academy were right. They'd called her a princess from day one. Though Kristoff had stood up for her then, he'd changed. Unlike the others who'd had to work harder and score higher than everyone else to make it, having a father with a legacy meant she'd gotten what they'd rightfully earned. He had every right to be angry.

But even though the academy, her classmates, her father, and even those she'd believed to be her friends didn't have faith in her skills, she believed with every molecule in her body that the Merciful wouldn't have lead her this far if she didn't belong in the sky.

Dana swallowed the insecurity and hurt.

"Nav, plot a course for the nearest star system," her father ordered, his voice as cool and calm as a lake in fall.

"Yes, Captain," Davis, seated to her right, replied. "Course plotted. Estimated time of arrival, two days."

"Helm, take us out manually."

Dana ignored the quick intake of breath she heard behind her. It wasn't unheard of for a pilot to fall back on manual controls, but it was for an ensign with no prior experience to do so.

Her father cleared his throat. He wouldn't repeat his order.

"Yes, Captain," Dana said. She input the manual commands as she'd been taught and trained to do. In her mind, she went over the steps one by one. Dana took in a deep breath, trying to find her center in the cool calmness of his voice despite the turmoil boiling her insides. Time slowed to a crawl as she waited for the ship to respond to her commands.

The floor beneath them roared to life, and Dana's heart rose up in her throat. She'd been piloting shuttles with her dad since she was ten, but this was the first time she had several hundred lives depending on her ability to get them into orbit. The temperature-controlled room grew warm, and she felt the beginning tingle of sweat in her armpits.

"Null at ground control, Captain, we're clear," Dana said.

"Excellent."

The clamps released. Control of the ship was now in her hands. Dana deftly maneuvered the ship up and away from the surface. They tore through the clouds in a flash. She engaged the stabilizers to manage the turbulence that rocked the ship as they passed from the lower to the upper atmosphere.

Then, in the space of a few seconds, they entered orbit above the planet.

Dana took in a steadying breath, the silence on the bridge a direct contrast to the elated joy screaming inside her head.

"Ensign, engage autopilot."

"Autopilot engaged," Dana replied.

The bridge erupted in applause, and Dana turned in time to see them all clapping–for her. Until that moment, she'd been thinking they were waiting for her to fail, but seeing their shining faces–even Commander Jury Jones was beaming back at her–she realized they'd wanted her to succeed.

Her smile faded as soon as her father stood.

"Lieutenant Commander Davis, will you take the helm? Ensign, I'd like to see you in my preparation room."

Dana hesitated, but with her father already heading off, there was nothing left for her to do but stand and follow him out.

He was waiting for her with a grin so wide she could see all of his teeth. He grabbed her by the shoulders, giving her an exited shake.

"You did it! Didn't I say you could do it?"

Dana remained poised and at attention, eyes on the wall to the left of his head, letting his excitement land on her like a bucket of ice water.

He pulled his hands away, smile quickly fading. "Why aren't you more excited?"

"I'm not the one who didn't think I could do it," she said woodenly. It was a lie, but it was her turn to speak. She wanted to revel in this triumph, but not with him. He didn't get to take delight in her success after making it impossible for her to fail.

His frown returned. "Sweet pea–"

"The academy board were the ones with doubts. Mark the occasion with them." She squared her shoulders, keeping her eyes on the wall behind him. "If that's all, Captain, I have duties to attend to."

A minute passed in silence before he spoke again, his deflated voice a whisper of its normal tenor.

"Dismissed."