Her Personal Instructor

Chapter 35

Samantha'S POV

Nanginginig ang kamay ko habang binubuksan ang pinto ng condo. After leaving in a hurry like that pagkarinig ang confession ni Lance, hindi ko alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon nya pagbalik ko. Pero ang alam ko lang, bibigyan ko ng tsansa kung ano man tong mayroon kami.

"Samantha." Nakaupo si Lance sa may sala, doon na sya nakatulog. Para bang inaantay nya ako. Tumayo sya at sinalubong ako.

"I'm sorry. Kung nabigla kita sa sinabi ko. Kung napressure kita, I can wait." Yung mukha nya, yung excitement, at hesitation.

"How about we give it a try. Only after we finished this."

That smile, yung abot tengang ngiti. Who can even say no to that face.

"Sige. After we finish this." He leaned and press a kiss on my cheek. Only, I looked up and held his face in both my hands. I have to tiptoe a bit to reach him, till my lips touched his.
Marahan ko syang hinagkan. Hindi katulad ng mga halik na pinagsasaluhan naming tuwing nagsesex kami. Not as lustful as those, more gentler, soft. Sabi nila, when you kiss someone, you pour your emotions in the kiss. I never understand that till now. Ngayon na hinahakan ko si Lance at pakiramdam ko, hindi ko maexplain. A thousand different emotions that makes me forgot what I discovered about my mom.

When we parted our lips, napansin kong nakatingin sa akin si Lance.

"Bakit?"

"Nakangiti ka. Isang totoo at genuine na ngiti."

And I am. Smiling. And I can't even stop. Just this feeling, his touch, his presence, how can anyone not smile.

____

Our day went perfectly well. Lance went out to fetch some stuff at Aphrodite's moon, and I stayed at the condo. Still working through my aunt's journal, but with a different perspective. Yung mga salita na nasa diary na yun, mga bagay na nagsasabi ng masama sa nanay ko. But now I am looking it at a different perspective. I'm not hurt. I'm sad. Nabuhay sila na galit at lungkot ang nasa puso nila. Ako, nabuhay ako na pagsisisi ang nasa puso ko. It's sad. It's a pity actually. Na nabuhay sila with the lack of love. I'm not going to live like that. Ilang taon din, na naniniwala ako, na dahil sa ginawa ko, I don't deserve happiness. Not until I corrected what I did. Pero narealize ko, I'm just a kid. At oo, gumawa ako ng mali, dahil pinili kong iligtas ang sarili ko. Pero dapat ko bang parusahan ang sarili ko ng dahil dun.
I deserve a shot at happiness. And Anna too. Lance on my side, matatapos na rin to. Makukuha ko ang mana. Magiging malaya si Anna. Kahit ako pa mismo ang magalaga sa kanya. I'll earn her forgiveness. But that doesn't mean I have to be miserable by doing so.

"Sige ha. Aral mabuti. Love you always, Liv." That was Lance's voice. May kausap sya sa cellphone, nasa balikat nya ito habang may mga bitbit na libro at papel. Sinara nya ang pinto ng condo gamit ang paa nya.

Jacin and I used to laugh at romance movies. Lalo na kapag yung bidang babae ay may 'radar'. Selos radar. Yung tumunog ang cellphone noong boyfriend, or may ngumiti sa kanila, at nagseselos agad sila, tinatanong nila kung sino yun. 'How pathetic.' I use to say. Gaano sila kainsecure para magkaroon ng superpowers na extraordinary hearing or sense.

Well, I have that now. Ng bigla akong tumayo at sinalubong si Lance. Inabot ko yung mga bitbit nya. Yung paperwork ko sa Aphrodite's moon na pinakuha ko sa kanya. Ayokong pumunta dun ngayon. I'd rather work at home.

"Love you always. Liv??" Ako na ngayon ang may superpower na hearing and overflowing insecurity. Ugh. I hate this.

Tumawa lang si Lance. Parang may joke na ako lang ang hindi makagets.

"Hindi ko ba nakwento sayo? Si Liv? My baby sister?"

"Oh." Yeah, I think nakwento nya pero hindi ko maalala, o hindi ko lang pinansin. "Ah, yung sister mo na nasa catholic school??"