Charlie Ever After

5o

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As soon as I saw that look on Charlie's face, I knew something was wrong. I was hoping when I asked that she would be honest with me, but instead she lied and it made the sinking feeling in my gut even worse.

"You ready?" Charlie was putting on a brave face but I knew her better than that. I could tell that deep down she was in turmoil. There were only a few times that I've seen that look on her face and every single time it had to do with her mother or Gavin.

I watched quietly as she chewed on her bottom lip and checked through her bag for the third time to make sure she had everything.

"Yeah." Charlie's gaze flashed up to meet mine, her eyebrows furrowing together, no doubt shocked by my emotionless reply.

I could tell she wanted to ask me what was wrong, but before she could say anything, I grabbed our beach bag and walked out of the room, leaving her standing there in stunned silence.

A few moments later, Charlie met us in the foyer as I had just finished loading up the last beach bag into the SUV that Andrew and Carlos so graciously let us borrow. It was going to be a tight fit with all of us but it was much better than rolling up to the beach in a camper.

I slid into the driver's seat and started up the car. Andrew had given me a simple set of instructions to get to the beach and according to him, it was only a ten minute drive, if that.

What I wasn't expecting when we arrived was my greatest nightmare coming to life. As soon as we pulled into the parking lot and I caught a good glimpse of the pier, my stomach dropped.

I haven't been back in over eight years, but as soon as I stepped out of the car and the salt air hit me, it was like I was sucked right back to that day.

I could hardly breath, hardly think straight. My body took over, lifting the hatch to the trunk and pulling out all of the beach bags, handing them off to their owners before pulling our beach bag up onto my shoulder and starting off towards the beach.

All I wanted to do was run far away, but my legs just kept dragging me closer. Eventually Charlie caught up to me, grabbing onto my hand and looking up at me with sad eyes. There were so many questions written all over her face but she didn't voice a single one of them, instead she squeezed my hand and walked next to me.

I don't know how long it took us to walk onto the beach or how long we took to set up our spots because all I could focus on was the memories of the waves suffocating me as I searched for Tessa.

Staring out at the crystal blue water, it looked almost serene and peaceful but I knew how menacing the ocean could turn in the blink of an eye, I witnessed it.

Eight years ago on this very beach, this exact ocean took my sister away. One minute we were all playing and laughing, enjoying our last day in California and then the next she was too far for us to reach. I swam as hard and fast as I could. I was so close to her. So close. But then she slipped away and the ocean swallowed her up, claiming her as its own.

The damn ocean took so much from my family that day. Not only did it take Tess, it took bits and pieces of us as a family and then eventually the pain of it all took my mother from us too. Nine years ago, I used to love the ocean. My parents used to call me a fish because of how much I loved to swim. They'd have to drag me out, pruny all over and begging for a few more minutes, but in one moment my love for swimming was ripped away from me as well as a huge part of me.

I don't know how I didn't put two and two together that this was the beach we would be coming to. I knew we came to San Diego every year, I knew Mission Beach was where we stayed and went on the boardwalk. There are over thirty Goddamn beaches in San Diego alone and of course fate would have it that Mission Beach was the one that Charlie's father lived right down the road from. The universe had a fucked up way of working sometimes.