no control

• thirty seven •

gladys

I blew out a breath and looked over the completed Scantron slip. It was just colored circles but I felt a bit of relief at it being done. Gathering my backpack, I took the paper up to my teacher's desk and put it in the slots.

My teacher whispered, "See you at graduation!"

I smiled, not wanting to interrupt the rest of the testers, and tiptoed out of the classroom. Once the door closed, I sagged against the wall. My brain was total mush. But I was done! With physics, at least. I hoped I at least passed but I had no idea.

I pulled out my phone to call Elijah when a voice sounded across the hall.

"Gladys, hey."

My head snapped up. A pair of familiar baby blues locked mine as Brant approached. He was dressed in jeans and a band t-shirt with a pencil tucked behind his ear. I gulped.

"Hey," I said, slipping my phone into my pocket.

"What'd you finish up with?"

"Physics. You?"

"Calculus." He offered a tight smile. "It wasn't so bad. How'd yours go?"

"I'm not sure, actually. Either pretty good or pretty terrible."

He chuckled. "I'm sure you did fine. You're smarter than you give yourself credit for."

"Thanks."

"So . . ." He cleared his throat. "How've you been?"

Pursing my lips, I thought about what a truthful response would be. "All over the place, honestly," I told him. "It's been kinda crazy lately."

"Yeah. I was sorry to hear about your cousin. I know you two were close."

The reminder of what happened to Bernice stopped my thoughts dead in their tracks. I felt gutted. I'd been ignoring the grief and pain, hoping it would just go away if I put it off long enough. I didn't realize I winced until I felt his arms wrap around me. He hugged me into his chest. I stood stiffly in his grip, hating myself for being so cold to him.

"I'm really glad you're safe," he said.

"Thanks." I forced myself to relax. He was just trying to be a good friend. "I miss her."

After a moment, he let go of me. I stared at his chest and tried to suck the tears back into my eyes. I didn't want to cry. I didn't want to fall back into that dark place Elijah had just pulled me out of.

"I can't imagine," he murmured. "If you ever want to talk about it or her, I'm here, you know."

"I appreciate that, Brant. I really do."

He nudged me with his shoulder. "Don't go calling me by my first name, now. That's for all these lame jokers."

I couldn't help but smile a little. "You did it first!"

"Fair enough," he said, his smile growing. "Whatcha got going on the rest of the day?"

"Probably more studying and maybe working, I guess."