athenaeum {kokonoi hajime} pt.1

770 25 59
                                    

[college au, fluff]

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[college au, fluff]

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Summary

It all started with your first library visit that was gradually filled with misfortunate events. Not to mention, on how you accidentally misgendering a beautiful man by calling him, 'Miss'.

Well, guess that awkward and embarrassing encounter should have ended there.

But nope.

Kokonoi Hajime wouldn't let it stop there, not when you have no clue what was he up to all this time.

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You hate going to places that you're unfamiliar with. It's probably just the root of your social anxiety and obviously, whenever you go places alone and you were clueless about the directions and such, you will always tend to double check the signboards or just follow your gut, even if there's an alternative of you asking people around you, you still refuse to do so.

You just don't want to talk with people that you don't know. You hate it so much. Strangers do scare you shitless especially knowing how unpredictable their behavior can be.

Sometimes even strangers walking around you makes you feel uneasy.

You just wish that this library is empty and it's just you in it. Maybe you can run around it and sing as loud as you can as if you lost your goddamn mind.

Yeah, it's such a random thought in your head but imagine...being able to do that without anyone looking or judging, that surely be the liberation you have been seeking so badly.

Being a first year in university and going through this first semester, it sure is a tough journey indeed. These four months were basically just you adapting to a new environment and trying your best to adjust yourself to...fit in of course.

Well, there are many coursemates who are nice to you. I mean, of course they'll be nice to you when you didn't do anything bad to them but then, there'll be the ones that just need to find something wrong or a flaw in every person and make fun of it just so they can feel better about themselves.

You're so sick with toxic people.

It's so sickening indeed.

And you do have friends, but you just don't know why, it just still feels like you're all alone. You miss your high school friends so badly and you will always believe how irreplaceable they are. Even during highschool, it took you time to finally find the real friends that you can rely on. Finding friends is luck, some people get them and there'll be ones that never had one in their whole life.

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