"I loved you, Angel," Leo cried. I could hear the voice cracks in his voice. I hurt him. I broke him. I made him into a stone-cold wall with ice around his heart.
"My daughter, Angela. She's my daughter! And you hid her from me."
I let out a shaky...
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"So, since today marks one year of us being together. We should have a thoughtful talk," I bargained.
I feel the rumble of Leo's laugh on my back. "Uh oh. What's happening?"
"We've been having sex for quite a while..." I begin and he laughs even more. "And we've gone raw a few times..."
His hand runs up and down my arm. "What? Do you want to stop?" Then he brings me closer and whispers in my ear. "Or did you want to pick up where we left off?"
"Not exactly...uh...I've had a pregnancy scare before. A while back with my ex-boyfriend. He totally freaked out and that's how our break started. So, I just wanted to know what would happen."
His body stills, but he still tries to make it seem like he hasn't tapped out. It doesn't work. "I...I'm really not open to having kids."
Confusion and hurt drench my face and I'm relieved he can't see my face. "Oh...I didn't know."
It was the sort of thing we never really talked about because we were so new. But now that we're breaching into dating for some years, it feels like it needs to be explored. His answer was not what I was hoping for.
"Do you want kids?" he hums.
I shrug and try to push down the strange feeling building in my throat. "I mean...I'm barely 20. But in the future, if the time came, I would be properly in love, and my financial and career situations were together.... maybe? Probably not, though. I never had the best role models growing up."
Leo stays silent and eventually his hands stop moving. I feel an uneasy silence creep around us. I was not too fond of it. I felt like it was choking us out.
"Would you ever change your mind?" I ask quietly.
He doesn't respond immediately, and the silence intensifies. "No. I wouldn't."
----------------------------
I feel a lump move on top of me. It wiggles around and jumps up and down. I groaned. I didn't want to open my eyes, but as a mother, I must.
"Guess what day it is!" she squeals when I open my eyes.
I look at the alarm clock next to me. 7:55 on April 15th. "Uh...Wednesday?"
Kat pouts and rolls her eyes. She crosses her arms and huffs. "Nuh-uh! Mommy, you know what day it is!"
I don't respond for a moment, and she frowns even more. I tickle her and she falls over, letting out huge giggles. I hold her close to me when she calms down and plants a kiss on her forehead.
