The Farmer and the Girl

Chapter Eight - A Promise

The letter on the desk was still blank for numerous days, despite Ava's mother constant reminders to send the reply she thought her daughter had prepared. But in fact, Ava was still unable to come up with an answer though she had many to use; having to quit to aid her family in managing the ranch was a simple convenient example but even she did not accept to use such an uncharacteristic excuse, then she thought of the ill man, a friend in need for another in his morbid days... but could she call what they had friendship? If so, was it this close? Would she allow a man she met for few months to hold such a capable grip over her future? Would she use a stranger as a hanger for her unmotivated return? The one true answer was clear beyond all the possible excuses, boredom, lost motivation, unresolved will.

When Ava reached the farmer's house and was led by a very elegant maid into his room, the sense of estrangement took a stronger hold over her, a sense that did not manifest in the open lands. She had only ever been inside his house for few visits when he got sick and every time she brought along a small bouquet that did not help assimilate a sense of familiarity.

Normally, when you sit by someone's bedside, you feel you have passed the barrier of social formality and grown closer but this time was different. When Ava's eyes fell on the ailing man the feeling of estrangement weighed heavier. Not only were they two strangers that met by accident on an unplanned break, now they stood completely opposite each other on the border of life. Indeed, as Ava stepped into the room, carrying her flowers she recognized the dreadful presence of an approaching departure.

Ava placed the flowers in a vase, and drew her seat closer to the man's bed. The tedious questions about well – being did not fit well and had no ring or echo so Ava chose silence, which was surprisingly comfortable for both of them and it slowly succeeded in restoring the previous aura of familiarity that existed between the two. Selfishly, at that moment, Ava thought she could indeed excuse herself from the ballet school for the man's, lying opposite her, sake.

"So how long are you planning to stay?"

Ava blinked at the sudden question, her self-doubt made her believe he was able to read her intentions.

"I do not know."

She honestly replied.

" I know it will not be long for me."

The farmer responded to his own question and the girl could not argue. The numerous phrases usually spoken in this situation roamed the tip of her tongue but all sounded too hollow for the man's intelligence and obvious acceptance of his condition.

"Ava, what are you doing here?"

He took her by his question off – guard again and before she could prepare an answer he went on:

"You said you were on vacation for few weeks, a month at most. Why are you still here?"

The girl shook her head, eager tears finding their way too easily down her cheeks.

"I do not know."

"Do not waste yourself here, Ava."

"Is not "here" your favorite place?"

Ava remarked with a tearful smile, trying to nudge his spirit up a little but she obviously was not the only desperate person in the room and she could not process how such a man who possessed an uplifting spirit came to be one.

"This is not who you are ... you have much more than that... "

The farmer clarified while reaching his hand shyly to Ava who took it without hesitation.

"This is untrue..."

She was sick of hearing this, she had nothing, she knew it too well even if she would not admit it out loud, despite her refusal to go back to that tiring struggle being a type of indirect confession.

"I have already made up my mind..."

Ava mumbled in a low tone, lying through her teeth, he tears clearly reflecting the still broiling conflict that drew hesitant words out of her mouth.

"I have nothing... I am..."

"There is nothing for you here, Ava."

But he had everything here, so why was he denying her her share of the serenity and tranquility of this place? He spent every minute of his existence caring for this little garden and now he would not let her in? Ava's chest boiled with anger before her eyes met his widening pupils, and became horrified by the emptiness they witnessed in the farmer's. For the first time Ava realized that despite the man's zealous rants about his work , the sense of entitlement that flew through his words was never reflected in his gaze.

" Don't be a fool, you are not meant to waste here... you have a talent... you have a bright... "

"Don't stir up my doubts again... I am already too afraid... "

Ava begged, hiding her face behind their entwined hands, tightening her grip over them but he would not let her escape and with a strength she did not imagine he still possessed, he reached with his other hand shaking her shoulder, forcing her to look up at him again, to face that panic she had never expected to be concealed behind the farmer's cool demeanor and calm exterior.

"There is nothing in this forsaken place, what are you going to do here, rot away? Do not waste your life and dreams... do not waste your potential... "

The farmer seemed as if he was almost imploring, in a panicked tone Ava did not believe he could muster. She could not tell what brought this up... did the hovering scent of death revive old dreams and forgotten wishes? Was it the clarity of death dawning on him? The passion in his advice and imploring was similar to his original passion when talking about his farm and labor fruits, albeit this one was stemming from fear. The two of them seemed to be rocking together, hand in hand, in an image close to wailing, as if both had realized that the scent of the fruit the farmer had spent his life growing and Ava craving had dissipated in mere seconds, its flavor vain and tasteless.

"Promise me, Ava, you will not waste your life here..."

Ava shook her head in fear, refusing to let the promise slip from her lips and the farmer kept insisting and insisting as she merely shook her head in reply until she finally yielded.

"I promise."

In the morning of the next day, the farmer died.