We were friends for a year
Last month or so, every time we started to fall out, or you started to pull out, I wanted to pull out
Like I put in the effort
You didn't
Enough to keep me close
But not close enough that you would admit it
We kissed
As friends
No one knew
No one cared
I didn't even care
You didn't love me
You even said it
You used to
I don't know what happened
I gave you everything
More than she did
That's why you kept me when you were switching people
You kept me closest for the in between moments
When someone didn't work out, for example
Or when you were waiting to find someone new
But I was happy you kept me around
I wasn't like those other girls
You threw them out
I got recycled
The highs were highs, lows were lows, that's easy to talk about
But the in between moments
You're not close with them
Or far for that matter
You miss them
But not enough to double text
You love them
But not enough to say it, knowing they don't love you back
They moved on
He told me to move on
And I thought I did
But of course, you came back
You come running back
Every time I find someone new
Sometimes I say I hate you
I know that I don't
I hate myself for not hating you
I saw everything you texted her
The things you told her the day you kissed me
How you loved her
And how she was meant for you
I knew that she was just one of your phases
But I couldn't help but think about the time when that was me
And why you never told me that I was meant for you
You never said my first name with your last
Never called me pretty
Or cute
Just hot, when you needed someone to turn you on
And you didn't tell me that you needed me for so long
I guess part of me knew you didn't
I didn't like the part of me that still loved you
You put me through hell
But I went through it with you in mind
Now I hope I can distance, as I started to
It's hard to distance yourself from someone that doesn't even notice something is wrong
He isn't running back for me
He isn't telling me he needs me
For me not to leave
And he never wrote me anything close to the essay he wrote her
Where did I go wrong?
Besides the fact I love you with all of me
YOU ARE READING
100 Chances I had to Give You
Short StoryLike my other short stories, please read them! I am trying to come out with more if I get readers. About an experience with someone that could never see my worth and that I loved with my whole heart. Enjoy, and I hope it helps if someone can relate.
