Academy Shorts

Silly Songs

Axel made an effort not to push open the apartment door within the Sergeant Jasper with excessive force, or to let it slam closed behind him. His mood was less than ideal, but he knew it wasn't healthy to bring the stresses from work at the aquarium home. His team would pick up on it and strain team dynamics unnecessarily. The tall, olive skinned man promised himself to visit the gym later in the evening to help balance his temperament out before he did something he regretted and the whole team would wind up doing hours over something petty.

Well, he was determined not to let his workday affect him at home until the grating laugh that was a cross between Popeye and Woody Woodpecker came from the television in the living room. All bets were off after that last straw.

The aquarium recently hired on a new manager to sort out some budget issues. To do this, he cut corners in all aspects of the facility and was constantly harping on Axel to settle on some regularly scheduled hours. Axel did not mind the constant nagging, but he felt things got personal when the culmination of little changes resulted in a tank full of dead sea stars. The budget cuts had sliced into the routine maintenance of the exhibit, and the poor creatures paid the ultimate price for it.

Axel didn't care if Raven was fresh off the boat from Russia and was learning American English from the kids television show; he wished Patrick Star was in that tank when he cleaned it out that very day.

The team liaison had noticed the rest of his brother had grown equally weary of the cartoon playing day after day.

"Pick something else to watch," Axel commanded. He steeled his voice to make it clear this was an official order and could not be disobeyed.

There was a twinge of guilt for barring the quickest method Raven had discovered to assimilate into American culture, as other language curriculums did not suit the Russian's learning style and made slower progress. But there was only so much mindless humor and bad voice acting the rest of the team could tolerate before succumbing to insanity. Spongebob Squarepants was the only show on their television for the past three months. Priorities had to be straightened, and sacrifices had to be made.

"Thank you, God!" Brandon cried with waving hands in the air.

"What?" Raven said in his heavy accent. "Spongebob is the funnies. Why you say no more watching?"

Axel tromped to his room. "Just... find something else." He felt like he was entitled to be lazy and cheap this one time around. He could count on Marc as Team Lead to explain things to their immigrant friend.

-One Week Later-

There weren't many times when every member of their team had the same time off from their day jobs, training, and Academy assignments to be able to gather in one place for a good sit down dinner. The fact that Raven could now read his own menu countered Marc's complaints about the coffee he was served at the downtown diner.

Kevin was just gushing about a girl he just met. No, not gushing. He talked animatedly about her, or whatever equivalent guys do among themselves when the conversation is about their love interests. Did teenage boys even label a term for it? This group didn't, but they at least knew it wasn't "gushing," even if was indeed what Kevin was doing whenever he said the name Mindy. Kevin's friends slapped him on the back and wished him well in pursuing a relationship outside the Academy when the waitress approached their table with a large, black tray carrying their food.

Everyone's plates were placed in front of them, steam rising off the freshly cooked food. Marc was the only exception. The table space in front of him remained empty. "Your cheeseburger will be out in a few, honey," the waitress said to him before retreating. Marc's stomach grumbled, but he gave permission for everyone else to go ahead and start eating without him.