Halal Heartbeat

Chapter 13

Manal

I met Amir at a work conference. I was fresh out of my extra studies and wanted to go to the conference to meet new people in the field. While he studied something completely different, we immediately clicked and became friends. He made me feel special, happy, and loved. I'd never experienced love from someone like him. I was in love with, essentially, love. The first time he told me he loved me, he promised me the world. Amir was from a rich and wealthy family, practically the dream guy. We got engaged and us and our families both couldn't have been happier. But then the cheating, drinking, and partying started to happen. He told me not to tell anyone and to follow through with the wedding or else he'd hurt me. Being timid and not wanting to lose him, I obeyed his every command. Almost every time I'd see him, he'd either be under the influence of alcohol, or have lipstick stains on his shirt. Astaghfirallah. I knew that this was Haram (forbidden by Allah) and that Allah would not be proud of me if I followed through with the marriage. So one night, I prayed Istikhara and the next day, he disappeared. After a week or so, I told my parents that things didn't work out between the two of us and that we didn't want each other anymore. Then we told his family and that was the end of us. Subhanallah. When Allah doesn't want something for you, he distances you from it. And even though it hurt at the moment, Allah made me stronger. I'm different now. I'm so much stronger. I put my trust in Him and in the end, I crossed the finish line of self improvement. After that, I never fell in love again. I had trust issues. I just couldn't risk getting hurt again so I built a wall and wouldn't let anyone come knocking, shutting them all out.

"Miss Mahmoudi," I looked up at the door. After telling Officer Gamez what had happened, he went and communicated it to the other officers. "I have some good news and some bad news." I motioned for him to go on. "The good news is that you've earned your right and Amir is subject to imprisonment for harassment and past attempts he's also made. The bad news is that charges were pressed against Mazin and that they're both badly injured." My face drops. "I-is he ok? Is Mazin ok, Officer?" I exclaim. I continue to break down but Officer Gamez reassures me. "Do you want to go see him?" I nod firmly. "I want to see Amir too. I need to talk to him in private." He agrees and I go see my fiance first. "Manal?" He asks. His face, full of bruises and a big black eye, still lights up when he sees me. "Mazin!" I exclaim and give him a quick hug. "Are you ok?" I ask, panicking. "I'm sorry, Manal. I took it too far, but I was just afraid of losing you, Love." I cry and laugh all at once. "No, Mazin, I'm sorry. I should've told you about my past with Amir, I'm the one who's sorry. I love you so much, and thank you." He smiles weakly. "I was just doing my job, protecting you." An officer clears his throat. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but if you'd like to speak with the other subject, now's your chance." I get up and thank him. "Take care, I'll visit you soon, Inshallah." I tell Mazin. With every step I take to him, I feel like I'm stepping on shards of glass. With every breath, I feel like I'm breathing so hard, I could create a storm. And with every heartbeat, I feel my heart crack and break to bits. I enter and see Amir, his head in his hands. I don't bother sit near him and stay in my place. "Stand up," He looks up, then drops his head deeper into his palms. "I said stand up." Amir does as he's asked, but avoids as much eye contact from me as possible. "I may forgive you, but Allah and those countless people you've hurt won't. How could you, Amir? You're parents raised you better than this. They taught you what was Haram and Halal (permissible in Islam). Astaghfarallah, you should be ashamed of yourself." He doesn't say anything so after a while, I just leave. "Hey," Brandon comes beside me. "Take as much time off as you can, ok? We've got other doctors who can take your shifts. And Mazin's getting healed at our Hospital; free of charge." I nod. "No, no, I want to work, it's fine. But when the wedding date arrives, I'll need some time off for my honeymoon." After working things out, I go to the hospital to be with Mazin. Both our families are there and his spend the night with him. I can't bare see him in this terrible state. "I'm going home now, ok? But I'll visit as much as I can, Inshallah." That night I prayed long and hard for him to get better. The events that occurred earlier that day made me realize just how much he cared about and for me. That he'd risk his life for me! He's the man that will keep me safe from harm and keep the sun shinning on my grey days.

Mazin

It's been a few weeks, but less than a month since I was in the hospital. I'm surprised I healed that fast, Alhamdullillah. When I saw Manal in so much pain and despair, it hurt me; to the point where I didn't even feel the jabs, kicks and punches being thrown my way. She deserves the best, and certainly not to be touched that way. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. "Come in, come in!" I yell. Manal walks in with a bouquet of flowers and her mum follows closely behind. "Alsalamulaikum dear, how are you feeling today? Good, Inshallah?" My auntie asks. I smile. "Great today, Alhamdullillah," I turn to my fiance. "Hey Manal, thank you so much for the flowers." She blushes. "Now since you're heading out of the hospital soon, Inshallah, we wanted to start picking a date for the wedding." Auntie exclaims. "Mama!" Manal says, embarassed. "No, she's right, Manal. I want to marry you as soon as I can, Inshallah. I want to complete half of my deen by marrying you and be proud to call you my lawfully wedded wife," I pause. "Enough with the corniness, what day were you two thinking of?" After discussion and planning, we decide on a date four months from now. "We have most things ready and don't want it to be too big, so that date fits perfectly, Inshallah!" Manal explains. "Now how do you feel about ring shopping?" I smirk.

"Ya Allah, this one's beautiful!" She cries. "I'll buy it then." Just as I'm pulling out my wallet, she pushes my hand away. "No, no, it's too expensive! Plus, there will probably be better options." I sigh deeply and chuckle to myself. After walking around different ring shops for hours, she finally picks one. "It's beautiful, Mashallah." Manal stares at it in awe. "What about your wedding dress? Oh my God, we didn't pick that out yet! There's a bridal store near here, maybe you can pick one from-" She cuts me off. "No, I already have one. But it's a surprise till the actual wedding day." She smiles cheekily at me.

"This venue's the perfect one. It fits around 500, which is more than enough since we want it a bit small." Amina laughs at her sister. "Manal, Mama's probably going to make you invite the whole Moroccan population of London. Yeah, I don't think that's more than enough seats, that's less than average." We all break into laughs and decide on a different venue, one beside the beach. "To be honest, an outdoor wedding is nice. We'll have the dinner and lowkey stuff on the beach when it's still light, then the party itself will be in the venue itself." I suggest. "Beach venue it is!"

"I want you to be happy on our honeymoon, so I'm going to let you chose anywhere in the world." Her jaw drops. "Are you bloody serious?" Manal squeals. I nod. "Oh my God, I want to go somewhere near, so my heart is telling me France." After booking a flight and two weeks at a hotel, we're all set for our honeymoon. Now all we have to do is actually get married.