Spinning Out

Chapter 37

JAINA

I couldn't sleep at all last night. This morning I'm driving to the hospital with a renewed energy. I can't wait to see Nathan and find out what's next in his recovery. His grandma will be stopping by later to see him, and I plan on getting ahold of Elijah during the time the two of us can't be in Nathan's room together.

I laid awake all night trying to think of what I wanted to do about Elijah. I think the only thing I can do is go to the police. The thought of it makes me sick. I don't want to believe he is capable of doing what he's done or covering for his friend. At the same time, it would make sense why he wanted to keep me close and to always be with me at the take-overs. It's a problem I'll try to solve later, for now I just want to see my friend.

Walking into the hospital this time feels different. It feels like I finally have hope for the first time. Nathan woke up. He responded to me. Now we just have to wait and see how much of his brain was affected by all of this. There is a risk some of the clotting went to his brain. They haven't been able to do any testing on him to see yet, but that should be happening now, I hope.

"Nathan Urban," I say to the woman at the counter. I take a mask from the box they keep for when people don't bring their own. I hate doing this but, in my rush, to get here, I forgot to grab one of my own. My vaccination card is tattered from pulling it from my wallet every day, but I set it in the counter so they can verify it.

Today I feel like there is finally hope that one day I can walk in here for the last time on my way to visit and instead I can walk in here to take him home. That day seems closer now. I smile at the woman when she hands me back my card and ID. I give her my arm so she can put on the bracelet.

I make it up to his room in time to see the doctor. It's perfect timing.

"Hello," he greets me as I step into the room.

"Good morning," I say. I set my bag down on the counter near the interior window without taking my eyes off him. "How is he doing? Did you hear he woke up?"

"I did," he says. He smiles at me and I wonder if he's really happy for Nathan or if the smile is something he's learned to use to put people at ease around their loved ones. Either way, it works.

"So what now?" I ask.

"I spoke with is grandma this morning," he tells me. "She said she'll be in later, right?"

"Yes," I answer.

"Good. I'm planning on having them reduce the dose again so we can ask him some questions. I won't keep him awake for too long. He's going to me in a lot of pain. His leg still needs to heal, but there might be more areas that are hurting him," he says.

"Ok," I say excitedly.

'Once we check for that, we will most likely keep him sedated until we are ready to pull the ventilator," he says.

"When do you think that will be?" I ask.

"Maybe as early as tomorrow," he says.

"Thank you," I tell him. "When will we know how his brain is doing?" I know it's not the best way to ask but I think he gets what I'm saying.

"We can evaluate him when he's fully awake. It might take some time to see any subtle changes or problems, but for the most part, we should get a pretty good idea when we take him off of the sedatives," he says.

I nod and he smiles as he leaves the room to check on his next patient. After I've settled into the chair beside him, the nurse comes in.

"When will his grandma be here?" she asks. "I am going to reduce the meds when she comes."

"I'll check," I say.

ME: They want to let him wake up. When will you be here.

GRNADMA U: I'm in the parking lot. I'll head up.

"She's here," I tell her.

"I'm going to call down to reception and allow them to let here up this one time. In the future the usual rules will apply," she says. She pulls a phone from her scrub pocket and makes the call.

I'm nervous. I want him awake, but I don't want him in pain. I also want to be close to him, but I have to leave the chair for his grandma, she isn't too good at moving around. It seems like forever before she gets up to the room. She hates it here and I don't blame her. This place is where she said goodbye to her son and his wife, Nathan's parents. She stand for a minute at his door. I can see the way she trembles slightly.

The nurse slips in behind her. "Are we ready?" she asks.

"Yes," I answer for both of us.

I motion for his grandma to come over to the seat. She nods and makes her way cautiously.

"It might take a while for him to wake up. Let me know if he's in too much pain or if you need anything else," she says.

We watch as she makes some adjustments to his medication. It's amazing to me that with a few pushes of a button, she can control something I've been praying for. Just as she told us it would, it takes a little while to notice the flutter of his eyelids again. I move his hand into his grandma's. She stares down at it. This whole experience has been a lot to deal with and I imagine it's been hardest on her.

"Nathan," I say.

His heart rate has picked up slightly and his eyes continue to flutter.

"He squeezed my hand," she tells me. I watch her holding on to him. Both of her hands now wrap around his.

"Nathan, can you hear us?" I ask.

His eyes open, but then close again quickly. I hold my breath and wait as if making the wrong move will take away any progress we've made. Finally, his eyes open. He searches around the room, taking in everything. His heart rate jumps and once again his alarms start going off.

'Is he ok?" his grandma asks.

"This happened last time," I tell her. I know they won't let him stay awake long, and I wouldn't want that either if he is in too much pain.

"We're here," I tell him. "We love you."

Nathan meets my eyes. He can't speak with the ventilator in, but he tries. It make him gag.

"Don't," I tell him. "It's ok." I move closer, resting my hand on his arm. "Are you in pain?" I ask.

Nathan nods.

We begin a guessing game. I call out a body part and he either nods or shakes his head.

Nothing surprising is discovered. He hurts in his throat, his abdomen, his face, and his leg. The doctor will have to do a more thorough round of questioning later. His face still has abrasions from the airbag and his chest will probably hurt for months from the impact. I'm still sore.

With the alarms sounding, the nurse comes back into the room. She waits for us to nod to her and then moves to the machines to let him go back to sleep.