Book III, Chapter 1

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'A man,' Ib echoed. 'We only have two of those, though don't take my word on the captain. Or did you mean "a person"?'

'I do not believe it would work on you,' Theo replied. 'For all my fears it could destroy you. You are all but immune to esoteric outside influences. As for the ghosts, their kind has always been unpredictable,'

'So, you want a test subject sure to be vulnerable.' Ib crossed its lower and middle arms, steepling its upper hands. The grey giant was thankful its face was featureless unless it wished otherwise, because, were it human, its ugly smile would have likely made Theo take back their offer-bribe? They had promised to truly, permanently restore its mind.

'We work with the tools we are given,' Theo said mildly, ignoring the way Ib's body rippled at the phrasing. 'But it is only human to wish for better ones.'

Greed is shared by all species, actually. 'I'll ask them,' Ib grunted, uncrossing its arms and beginning to walk towards the exit. 'But don't be surprised when they refuse.'

***

' 'Course I'll go! What's it even gonna do, kill me?' one of Three's selves scoffed, the other two elbowing each other. 'At least this time, I'd know the cause.'

'You are not going anywhere,' I frowned, giving the ghost a stern glare, before looking at Ib. Three had only volunteered first because he'd spoken faster than me, as he often did.

We weren't in the interrogation cham-ah, Electoral Council meeting room. Instead, we had been escorted through a confusing series of featureless, twisting, identical corridors and into a small, empty room, by a squad of Freed and one of the blue Ib lookalikes. Probably so we wouldn't be able to remember our way back if we decided to escape.

This would have been a good idea-if I had trouble remembering the way, most people would have been helpless-if we had been mundane humans. However, Ib could have easily bulled its way straight through the ship itself, I doubt they'd have been able to stop Three, and I was sure Mharra had a trick or twelve for getting out of situations like this. The man was far too annoyingly cheerful not to have gotten jailed at least a few times.

'You still need to remember your death and find peace,' I continued, looking back at the ghost. 'I, for one, know exactly how I'll die: either at my people's hands, if they're still hunting me, or of old age, convinced they could appear any moment, if not.' I tried to smile self-deprecatingly, but given the pitying looks I got from Three and Mharra, and the hand Ib put on my back, it didn't work.

'I won't let you do it, Three,' I said, face serious once more. 'Ib can't, either: even if it worked, I wouldn't risk the experiment destroying or damaging it, physically or...otherwise.' Ib, obviously, didn't remember its lapses into unconsciousness, only that they had happened. Even so, I didn't want to mention them and hurt it, or worse, trigger one.

'And the captain is the soul of the troupe. All of you...are valuable to the crew. Let me.'

There was some fatalism at play, I would say. The idea of finally being free of living in fear and simultaneously helping a friend live the best way it could appealed to a certain part of me.

The part that shirked responsibility, I suppose.

Mharra swept his gaze across us, shaking his head at Ib when the giant hesitantly lifted and opened a hand, looking like it wanted to say something.

'This is like that "no, you first" joke,' the captain murmured to himself, sitting down in one corner of the whitewashed room, then drawing his knees to his chest and crossing his arms over them. 'Except it's not funny. No one...is going to laugh at this, save whoever wishes us ill.'

To my surprise, he did not look at me when he said this, but at Three, whose selves pursed their lips. Finally, the one in the middle smiled shakily. 'Come on now, love. I'm sure  some people would get a kick seeing how courteous we are in the face of uncertain death.'

Mharra didn't laugh. He didn't smile back, either, so I looked at the giant.

'Ib,' I said, causing it to tilt its head at me. Even though it wasn't mimicking a face, I could feel its weariness, permeating the hatred for its former home and the hope for finally becoming all it could be, a hope balanced by the fear of losing a friend. 'Do you think they'll kill us once the experiment is over, whether it succeeds or not?'

They'd obviously try to kill us if we refused, whether we tried to escape or negotiate another way for Ib to regain its memories.

The giant's chin rippled, before becoming solid once more, now gleaming. 'I will not let them.'

So, it believed they would. Just as well...

'Shall you choose one of us, captain?' I asked, turning back to Mharra, knowing he'd refuse as soon as he stood up.

'I had to ask,' I said at his look, hands raised placatingly. A few months ago, I'd have probably thought he was just pretending to care about his subordinates to prevent future mutinies, but...I knew better now. Even if he just didn't want me on his conscience, I knew he loved Three and liked Ib, just as I knew any of us dying would have shaken the whole crew.

So, instead, we voted, and began making plans for our next destination after departing the Free Fleet, however the experiment ended.

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