𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸. rant book

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rant O14. no more joshua 

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4 / 8 / 23 

okay so um i think it was on february 27th 

joshua and i broke up 

bc we both felt it was best just to be friends

and our relationship wasnt really working 

he was constantly jealous of me hanging out with my guy friends 

and i didnt like how he would always say thinkgs hinting about that 

and there was a lot more stuff but anyways we're over and done for 

it was actually pretty hard getting over him 

bc he was the first person who i thought i might be able to last with until the end of high school 

so um yeah that was pretty heartbreaking 

i think i cried like every night just thinking about it for over a whole week 

and its also why i took a short hiatus back at the beginning of march 

and honestly im still not sure if im completely over him 

i mean im done having romantic feelings for him but im not done feeling for him completely

every time i see him or someone says his name i kidna just feel like this thumping feeling in my chest 

yeah its hard 

and im just so mad because i told him one of my most deepest , intimate fears 

i trusted him that much 

and hes just going around like nothings happened between us

friends ? 

yeah right he doesnt even talk to me anymore

and i know its not but i cant help but feeling like im the one who did something wrong 

but im dating someone else now so—

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end of rant O14. 

new rant coming hopefully by later today <3 

— emms