Faking Perfection

13|Hurt

𝟙𝟛|ℍ𝕦𝕣𝕥

With my Dad coming into town next weekend, I'm trying to get all of the 'bad girl' addictions out of the way. I skipped school twice this week with Willow and smoked up the last of my cigarettes. I'll get more, but while he's here, I'm going to lay low.

My father is much more observant than my mother, who is too focused on her work to analyze the small details. But when my Dad is home from football, he spends every second of time with us. I'm not complaining, of course, but the things that I normally get away with won't be possible when he's here. I have to become the little saint they think I am.

Plus, if what Everett says is true about our Dad possibly retiring, how am I going to swing it? How am I going to dress the way I want if he's going to insist on driving me to school? How am I supposed to fuck Zane's brains out if my Dad will be watching the clock, waiting until I get home from school? I could lie and make up excuses, but he'll see right through them. He used to be a troubled teenager. If anyone would figure my facade out, it would be him.

So, naturally, I'm lying on top of Zane's bed to try and get as many orgasms as I can before we'll have to take a break for a few days. After his speech the other day, I know I should have told him to get lost and to dump his ass, but if I'm being honest with myself, I'm not sure I want to end things between us. Not yet, anyway. The main reason being that I can't have sex anymore without thinking of a certain boy who isn't Zane. He's a boy who is the complete opposite of Zane, actually.

But if I were to jump into this with someone else, and if I still had that certain boy on my mind, I'd feel even worse. At least in this situation, I know there are no feelings attached from Zane's end. It's purely pleasure, so for now, I'm sticking to this arrangement.

"You're so fucking hot," Zane says, panting heavily. He puts both arms behind his head as we try to get our breathing under control, but I'm still in guilty mode about thinking of another guy. I can't allow myself to feel the relaxation yet. "I'm the luckiest guy in school."

I prop my head up on my elbow to stare down at him. "You're just now figuring this out?"

He shrugs. "Nah, I've known it for a while, but today just made it more prominent. Some guys were talking about you in the locker room during gym class. Gross fantasies and such, you know, the obvious, but your friend almost took them both out."

"Mason?" I ask. He told me he couldn't study together today after school, but I thought it was because of debate club or something, not because of this. "What do you mean he took them out?"

"He tackled both of them at once." He laughs as the memories unravel in his head. "I didn't think Mason had a fighting bone in his body, but he got a few good punches in before Palmer and Jamie got over their shock and fought back."

In seconds, a hard ball forms in the pit of my stomach. Jamie and Palmer are two of the biggest guys on the wrestling team. What in the hell was Mason thinking? And why is the thought of him coming to my defense turning me the hell on?

"Is he okay?" I ask quietly. My thumbs are playing with the corner of his sheets as Zane's gaze lingers on mine.

"Do you want him to be?"

"He's my friend. Of course, I want him to be."

Zane rises from the bed and begins to put his clothes back on, shaking his head. "Friends don't tackle other people like that for each other. The look on his face was primal, Izzy. I'm not an idiot. I know how to read people better than you think."

Now I start to become angry. "So what if he has feelings for me, Zane? If I'm not mistaken, this agreement between us allows us to flirt with whomever we want. If I choose Mason, it's none of your business."