They don't know (I've waited all my life)

chapter 9

Maya could smell the smoke etched on to her skin, it wasn't often that she was covered in soot considering she rarely faced fires anymore. But when she did, the tingling feeling of fire surrounding her, the adrenaline rush, the " firegasm" as she had once called it was all she could think about.

When she's in a fire Maya forgets to breathe, it's this overwhelming sense of calm and serenity that surrounds her, knowing that her mind slows down allowing her to let go of any thoughts in her head not pertaining to the fire.

At least that's how it had been inside the building when she had been called out for a 4-alarm fire with Chief Ross present there for incident command. This was the first time she'd actively gone inside a boring building with 19 behind her following her every move, allowing them to forget any problems and focus on what they did best, saving lives.

Inside there they had been nothing short of a team, but things were different away from the fire. Maya's sense of calm instantly washed away as she looked up to see the starry sky. The Sun was still up high at its peak when they had gone but now it had entirely vanished from her view, replaced by the dark open sky.

Looking at the half-moon Maya's thoughts floated back to Carina, the brunette was probably worried sick as she always was when Maya had been called to bigger fires, thoughts of Carina sitting in front of the hospital TV checking her phone constantly probably waiting to get off shift.

Maya reached inside the engine looking for her phone, finding it inside the center console. She quickly removed her gloves and entered her passcode seeing a flood of messages from Carina, instead of replying she decided to call her, knowing she'd be better off hearing Maya's voice.

"Maya..." her voice rang through the phone reaching the blonde's ears

"Hey Car, I'm okay, we just finished off here and my shift is almost over, I'll be home soon my love"

She heard her sigh on the other side of the line "I was worried sick" she paused. "It looked really bad on the news and it's been so long since you've gone inside the fire..."

"I know tesoro, but it's okay, si? I'm okay" She sighed before continuing "You really shouldn't look at the news, it always seems worse than it is"

"You know...Bailey said the same thing" she laughed

"You talked to Bailey about it?" the blonde inquired

"Mhm... we were both sort of hovering around the nurses station every few minutes trying to look for updates and eventually she noticed me there too" the brunette said "we both tried to calm each other down, she was just as worried about Ben" Carina sighed "Apparently it doesn't get any better after years and years of marriage to a firefighter"

Maya's forehead had creased a little at that not knowing what to do with having caused Carina to worry so much "I'm sorry Car, I know my job's really high risk and I wish it didn't make you worry so much"

"Bambina no...it's not your fault bella, I just worry because I love you, and I know your job is high stakes but you love your job and I love how much you love your job, so you never need to apologize for it, si?" her wife said, like the thoughtful person she was, melting Maya's heart

"Ti amo tanto" Maya had been at a loss for words not knowing what else to say to her wife's sentiment

'"Ti amo tanto Chief Bishop, I can't wait to be at home and kiss you"

Maya had laughed at that "I'm looking forward to it Dr. DeLuca"

...

Vic had been on the other side of the rig when she heard Maya talking on her phone, she was happy that the blonde had found someone who could put a smile on her face after something as exhausting as a 4-alarm, she now more than ever wanted to meet her wife knowing the woman had to be one of a kind, but she knew her and Maya were far from being at that point in their friendship.