where stars land | haobin

twelve.

There's a party of them assembled at the airport the next morning to send Zhanghao off; Hanbin, Ricky, Matthew, Yujin, Gyuvin, Ollie, and the rest of Zhanghao's family. There's only one suitcase for him to carry onto the plane; the rest of his belongings were packed up into boxes and sent in advance yesterday morning, but even so Yujin and Ollie insist on offering to help him carry it, taking turns sitting on it and pushing each other back and forth.

Zhanghao's flight takes off at eight, which means by seven he's said his goodbyes and entered the departure lobby. Hanbin's hardly awake enough to really register the fact that he's leaving for good; Zhanghao reaches out for a hug and he lingers on their last kiss for just a few seconds, more than aware that there are too many people around for them to do what they really want to.

"I love you, Hanbin-ah," he whispers, reluctant to let go, reluctant to pull away for the last time. "I'll see you soon."

Hanbin breathes in the smell of home, almost as if he was trying to keep every piece of Zhanghao he could have. "I love you. Have a safe flight."

"I'll call you when I land, I promise. In the meantime, go back to sleep," Zhanghao says, laughing, carding his fingers through Hanbin's barely-concealed bedhead. "Thank you guys for waking up early to send me off. I'll miss you all, so let's stay in contact, okay? Don't forget about me or I'll be mad."

"Who could forget about you..." Gyuvin says, feigning an exasperated expression. "We'll miss you. You'd better come back to visit us soon, or else."

"Okay, then," Zhanghao answers, smiling, passport and boarding ticket in hand. "I guess this is it. Goodbye, everyone!"

By the time it sets in fully, that Zhanghao is really gone, they're already piled into the car, driving away from the airport, as the final strokes of sunrise color the morning sky. Matthew asks if Hanbin wants him to come over. Hanbin thanks his best friend for looking out for him, but says no. All he really wants to do is get back home and go back to sleep.

Matthew only agrees to leave him alone after Hanbin promises to text any of them if he's lonely or needs anything, and Ricky's driver stops in front of Hanbin's house to let him off before driving off again, leaving him standing on the doorstep of his house, keys in his pocket, but making no move to open the door. Backing away from the front door, he sits down on the curb, curling up, wrapping his arms around his knees as he stares into the empty street.

They used to play together in front of Hanbin's house. It's one of the first memories he has of Zhanghao; playdates in the autumn of the year Hao's family moved here, when Hao could barely speak any Korean yet always knew what Hanbin wanted to say when he smiled. When the winter came and the temperatures dropped low enough for the snow to stick to the ground, they'd made snow angels in Hanbin's front yard, and hidden behind the picket fence to throw snowballs at people passing by. They got scolded after that year and never did it again, but their friendship went on for years to come.

Hanbin eventually gets up from the curb and goes back inside, collapses into bed without changing and doesn't awaken again until the afternoon has come and gone.

─

Come Monday, Gyuvin and Matthew revert to the Hanbin-protection strategy they'd used that day he and Hao pretended to break up, except from now on it's real. Matthew shifts to Hao's seat in class permanently, which he apologises to Taerae about before class starts, but Taerae's the kind of person who can get along with anyone, so he doesn't really mind the shift all that much.

At lunch the other Hanbin stops by their table to give Hanbin a carton of chocolate milk and Matthew pretends it's an accident he's ordered two sides of fries instead of one and insists Hanbin has the other, and Hanbin's mildly amused by the extra attention they're giving him, but more than that he really just wishes they would go back to normal. That everything would go back to normal.

"You guys don't have to go out of your way to be nice to me," he says, a little sheepish. "I'm not going to fall apart, you know."

"I know," Matthew says, dipping a fry into ketchup. "But we're trying to cheer you up as much as we can."

"Thank you for looking out for me," Hanbin answers, smiling. "I appreciate you guys for being concerned. I just want to feel normal again."

Truthfully, Hanbin does appreciate the distraction. They're about half a day ahead of Zhanghao in the States, which means it's just about dinnertime for him when Hanbin wakes up for school, and by lunchtime Hao's getting ready to sleep.

It's the hardest thing to get used to, the fact that Hao's not by his side every moment of the day for him to turn and say anything he wants to. That, coupled with the fact that Zhanghao is occupied with unpacking at his student dorm and getting settled in with his neighbors and classmates, severely reduces the amount of time they really have to talk to one another, but Hanbin anticipates it's only a temporary situation, and they'll figure things out properly once things are more stable. In the meantime they've resorted to just spamming one another with messages while the other's asleep, for them to read when they wake up, which at the moment seems to be a somewhat viable solution.

Hanbin snaps a picture of his lunch, together with the other Hanbin's chocolate milk and Matthew's extra fries.

hao <3

1:12PM

[1 photo attachment]

look how well they're treating
me while you're gone

should have asked you to
leave sooner

okay that was bullshit

i miss you

hope you're getting proper rest

i love you sleep well

is there a point in saying
goodnight when the other
person's already asleep

goodnight anyway

text me when you're
awake, i'll probably be having
dinner then

1:15PM

kuanjui came by our table and
he looks even more devastated
about you leaving than me LOL