an arcadian summer

chapter 2

I pace back and forth infront of the bathroom mirror, knowing Jamie is here any second. He probably think this is an emergency by how I sounded when I called, but I needed him to drop everything now or I'll end up not telling.

It's 2 pm, I spent my whole morning helping Inez at the bakery. We've always worked there as a summer job and I get to hear about everything that's happening in town. The money is just a bonus, I just spend it on books. Anyway, Inez helped me with how I should tell Jamie. She's a very straight forward person so I ended up disagreeing a lot. We did end up agreeing one way, which I've been reciting here in the bathroom.

"Rosie?"

I was too caught up I didn't even hear him knocking on the door.

"In a sec", I say and pretend to wash my hands.

I open the door, nervous and hoping he will understand when I see his face.

"Uh, follow me", I decide to tell him in my bedroom. It's probably easier that way.

We walk in silence on the way to the bedroom and I quickly close the door behind us. He turns around when he realises I'm just standing infront of the door.

"Is everything okay?" he asks, his hair a bit wet and I assume he's just been out surfing before I called.

"Yes. I have to tell you something", I try to smile.

"Tell me", he says, his forehead creased.

"I'll be out of town in two days, and will be for a while."

I watch his face go even more confused and I almost forget what I'm supposed to say.

"And you didn't think to tell me this sooner?"

"I did, I swear, but I just never knew when to tell you", I answer.

"Rosie, we made plans! Where are you even going? You never travel." Of course I never travelled when I never even had the chance.

"I know and I'm so sorry, I just want to do this. Alone", I start to feel guilty knowing we did made a few plans, but I need to use this chance. He will understand.

"I don't hear about this until now, how long will you be gone?", his voice sounding a little angry.

"Till August."

I walk over to the bed and sit down, preparing myself to explain.

"August?! What the fuck were you thinking, don't you think this is a little selfish of you? I know you've always wanted to travel but this is ridiculous."

This was not how I expected him to react. I try to look at him, but my eyes stay down on my hands.

"No I don't. You know how I always take my chances, which I've done for this summer. I'm sorry I didn't tell you but it's only for this summer", I go off script, completely forgetting what I memorised. He stands infront of me and I look up at him.

"What about me? You don't even seem sorry for not telling me this", he says, looking back at me dead in the eye. I can feel my eyes form tears at how he won't understand. Of course he doesn't when all spring he's always been so busy, almost never making time for me. I'm not gonna cry for that.

"Well I am, and it's not like I'm leaving you. I'll be back", I say loudly.

"Back from what? Do you want to have a break from us?"

I stand up from the bed, absolutely shocked. Now he's looking at me as if I've admitted it or something. I'm tired of this.

"No! I just want to be out of town this summer, is that too much to ask? You said you know how bad I want to travel", I almost close the space between us but he backs away.

"I don't believe you, you're a selfish little brat. I've always been here for you, you know that, and then you do this! Obviously you're hiding something and I know you."

We're both angry now. This wasn't in any of my expected scenarios.

"You don't understand", I step forward to him but he steps back again. My hair falls on my face as I look down instead.

"Yes I do, you just won't realise how selfish you're being. The waves today were perfect and then you make me come here just for you to tell me all this", the words come out fast and loud. I try to come up with a better explanation but I realise I shouldn't have to explain myself more.

"You know what? I'm done with you, we're over. Get out", I signal to the door.

"You can't leave me. We both know better than that", he steps forward but now I'm the one backing.

"I said get out."

He tries to step forward but I back away. We stare at each other in silence, I notice his jaw clench.

"James, leave", I wince at how mad I sound then I see his expression change. Finally.

"This is the last time I let you in my door."

He shakes his head and I watch him walk out silently. I hear the front door open then Jules' voice saying something to him. I quickly wipe my eyes before the tears fall as Jules knock on the door. I hear the front door shut and suddenly everything is silent.

"Come in", I say, sitting cross legged on the edge of my bed. She opens the door and walks over to me.

"What was that?"

"Oh, nothing. Don't worry about it", I tell her. I know she knows that's false but I don't want to worry about the situation anymore.

"You sure? He seemed pretty mad."

I look at her worried face and nod. She gives me a comforting smile, hoping I will tell her.

"It's fine, I mean it. Just don't tell others about what you saw", I sigh.

She fakes a cough and awkwardly leaves the room. I lay my back down on the bed, glancing at my suitcase in the corner.