Loving Lilith

Chapter 1: The other woman will always cry herself to sleep

"Why?"

My lips wobbled. Tears were threatening to leak from my eyes but I took a deep breath, trying to prevent that. I can't cry Infront of him. Not when she's next to him, looking between him and I with her big brown eyes which covered half of her face.

He didn't reply. Keeping his lips straight he simply interlocked his hand with her.

I swallowed hard.

"Is she prettier than me? Or does she have a better body?"

He narrowed his blue eyes at me.

"Not everything is about looks."

I've had enough.

"THEN WHY WOULD YOU CHOOSE HER OVER ME? WHAT DOES SHE HAVE THAT I-"

"She's sweeter than you! She's kinder than you, and most importantly, she isn't a bully like you are! She cares about me and I care about her." He looked angry.

How dare he look angry when I was the one who was cheated on. I was the one with the broken heart. I should be angry. I should slap him. I should kill him. He brought this other women into our relationship.

I took a deep breath. I could still fix him. If I try hard enough, he'll come back to me.

"We spent two years together, Jason. You can't just bring this other woman and expect that-"

"She isn't the other women here. She loves me and I love her. The only person who's extra here is you. You are the other women here. Not her. I think you should go home. You are kind of causing a scene here." He reasoned, his eyes boring into mine.

I looked around and indeed, the entire cheerleading team and the basketball team stared at the three of us.

My best friend, the head cheer leader, was simply watching the entire drama unfold. She knew, in fact everybody present here knew about this other than me. Nobody told me anything. They were my friends too. But apparently, they were only Jason's friends.

"Why should I go? Why would you do this to me? If you liked her, you could have just told me instead of cheating on me." I felt helpless, embarrassed and humiliated.

"And you'd break up with me just like that? We both know how much of a psycho you are. You don't even know how hard these two years were for me. You happen to be the most self centered, obnoxious and toxic girl I've been with. Thank god you finally found out and me and Charlotte. I didn't think I could tolerate you for even a minute now, so just fuck off Lily. Just fuck off." He looked like he wanted to swallow me whole.

Why would he date me if he thought I was this obnoxious?

Tears finally leaked from my eyes, and they were uncontrollable. They kept flooding down.

Of course, I wouldn't be the girl who'd get a happy ending. I was always the mean blonde girl the bad boy is with after which he meets a good girl and they fall in love, leaving behind the mean girl who was the other woman in their love story. The other woman, who will always cry herself to sleep because she doesn't get a happy ending.

Why does this always happen to me? This is the third or maybe the fourth time a guy has left me for some other girl. Am I the one at fault? What am I not doing to make a guy stay? Am I not enough?

"Are you really crying? After torturing me for years, do you really think you should be the one crying?" He looked at me, irritated.

"Why?" I cried out, tears getting into my mouth and everywhere on my face. My mascara was trailing down and blurring my vision, but I didn't care.

He scoffed at me.

"Do you know how hard it is to love a girl like you, Lily?"

*****

"I'm sorry to say this, but she's no more. You guys were late. She should have been brought in the minute her chest was starting to ache. She was..."

I zoned out. I didn't want to hear what the doctor was saying. My Nona was no more. My Nona was no more.

My Nona was no more.

Heart attack, they said. Nobody was home when she had a heart attack. My younger sister, Bella, was sitting quietly beside me in the waiting area of the hospital. She was silent.

She wasn't close with Nona like I was, not even Trevor, my older brother, was close with her. In fact they ignored her in the house. They treated her like a burden.

But I didn't. We were close. She loved me the most in the whole world. I loved her too. Hell, I always thought she'd be the maid of honor at my wedding. She was my best friend.

I was the black sheep in my family, you know. My brother was studying law at Harvard while my younger sister was training to be best balled dancer in the world. And then, there was me, the middle child. I wasn't smart enough like my brother neither was I talented like my sister. I was average but according to everyone in my family, I did excel in disappointing everybody. That, could be my talent.

Even at school, I wasn't the main character, neither was I the main villain or the mean head cheer at school. Instead, I was the head cheer's sidekick. The one, who didn't have a personality of her own. Always after boys, fashion and looking down on others. My parents and everybody knew that I was somewhat of a bully. Sure, I never bullied anybody on my own but I always supported and hung out with those who did.

My parents thought I was a lost cause. Maybe that's why they never actually focused on me. I wasn't their favourite.

My Nona, however, did believe in me. She'd always say that, there was some good in me, which quite frankly, even I failed to see. She always supported me. In fact, she was the reason my dad couldn't send me away to boarding school four years ago.

I stood up. My sister looked at me, raising her eyebrows, "Where are you going?" she asked.

"Just getting some air." I said, as I walked away from the area. I was looking around when I saw the stairs leading up towards the terrace. I hurried off. I needed to get away from here, from this stupid hospital smell.

I forcefully pushed the door open, upon which hung a banner saying "no entry." If people aren't allowed, then keep the door locked.

The sunlight made my vision go dark for a minute before adjusting to the light. I swallowed, before slowly walking towards the railing, I sat on it. I could see the entire city of Almora right under my feet. Looking down the twelve floored building, I realised if I were to fall from here, I wouldn't survive.

Slowly, I pulled my legs towards myself, and stood up on the railing. The sun was shining bright, the cars on the road down there weren't stopping even if their life depended on it.

If I were to fall from here, or maybe if I accidently fell from here, I might die. If a bird flies past me and I get startled and I fall off, I could die. Or what if someone pushes m-

"Are you trying to jump from here? Do a backflip while doing so, its kinda getting boring without any entertainment here."