TW!! THIS ONESHOT WILL BE CONTAINED WITH SUICADAL THOUGHTS AND ATTEMPTS. IF SOMEONE YOU KNOW IS GOING THROUGH SOMETHING HARD AND THINKS THEY SHOULD DIE, GET HELP!!
She can't stop the horrible memories from coming back again. She places her hands on her face and starts crying, crying until she can't anymore. Crying until she's out of breath. She hates herself so badly.
Them screaming. Blood everywhere. Him looking at her with a horrified look. The look that said, "What have you done. It's your fault.
"Why couldn't you have died."
And now Angela's there too, wailing as blood flowed from her nose. The flashes where back, this time so strong that it hurt her head. El sat down, gasping. She couldn't stop crying. Will would call this a 'panic attack,' where she got sucked into a bad reality. Where her mind would play tricks with her, only thing was that it was bad tricks.
Max was also there, along with Lucas.
"I don't wanna die; I'm not ready." gasped Max, blood coming from her pale blue eyes.
"You're not going to die, please hang on," sobbed Lucas. "ERICA, HELP!!"
El choked on a sob. She felt so... useless. What was the use of her powers if they couldn't even save the one person she loved?
El forced herself to open her eyes. The panic attack was leaving, but El couldn't help feeling that she should do something.
Something she should have done a long time ago.
She is in the store. She grabs a 6-foot long rope. This should hold her good. Placing it in front of the attendent, she took out her purse and paid the man $4.99. He eyed her with suspicion, but said nothing. As El walked home, she was greeted by a hug. By none other then Max Mayfield, the love of her life. No, the love of her past life.
"Max, I-... I love you." It came out of her mouth, and she could do nothing to stop it.
"I- Oh El.. I don't feel the same way... I'm so sorry..." Max had said. It was the day after Max had woken up from her coma. El's heart sank as she realized what Max had said. "We can still be friends, right?"
"Yeah, sure..." El said, trying not to try. Don't cry. Not in front of Max.
"Cool." Max had said, hugging her. El tried to remember how it had felt, the way Max wrapped her arms around her and held her tight. The way the wind softly blew at her ginger hair, making it go up and down. That moment would have been great if it weren't a rejection.
El snapped out of that flashback. She forced herself to look into Max's blue eyes and smile. Forced, but she hoped Max wouldn't notice. As she pushed herself out of that hug, she could feel Max's eyes on her. Probably looking at the rope.
"El." Max said. It sounded as if she hesitated, but forced herself to talk.
"... Yes?" El said, looking at Max. Max looked concerned.
"What are you.... going to do with that rope?" Max asked. Her blue eyes were wide with worry.
"Nothing." El said, too fast. She hoped Max hadn't noticed. She forced herself to walk away. She walked until she was finally in front of the house that she had lived on for about 4 years. Sighing, she went passed that. She forced herself to walk into the woods. Once she was deep enough, she chose a high branch and tied a knot in the branch, with a loop. This is where her head'll go. She took a deep breath and placed her head in.
Gasping for air, El yelped. Her life was flashing before her eyes.
The first thing she could see was bright light. And a docter who removed his mask. Then everything went black. First thing she could hear was beeping and screaming.
The second thing she could see was white. A tall blonde man loomed over her, looking at her with a small smile on his face. Second thing she could hear.
"Hello, Eleven."
El could hear someone screaming, but that was probably all the people she's killed.
