𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 // 𝑱𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑴𝑷𝑰𝑶𝑵

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘺 𝘛𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦

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"Hey," I say as I sit down across from Jack with shaking hands "Hey," He smiles at me 

"Did you make it here okay?" He asks nervously "Well I'm here aren't I?" I say 

"Right, of course," He nods before looking down "I already ordered, I got what you usually get, I hope that's okay," He says 

"Yea, that's fine," I say while giving him a half smile even though he's not looking at me "Good," He says while picking up his head and looking at me 

"So uh how have you been," He says while setting his hands on the table and crossing them "You want the real answer or the answer that'll make this go by faster?" I ask while leaning back 

"The real answer," He says and I sigh "I've been shit," I shrug 

"Why?" He asks and I scoff "Well, I know why but what has been going on?" He asks quickly and I can tell he's really nervous and anxious 

"I don't know just me not being able to eat, get out of my bed, you know feel good enough about myself, writing sad songs, releasing said sad song, um, crying, a lot of crying," I say and his eyes widen slightly 

"Indi..." He says while his gaze softens "Oh no, don't feel bad for me that's the last thing I want," I say while shaking my head 

"Of course, I'm going to feel bad, I'm the one who put you through this," He says softly like as if his voice is gonna break me "I'm so sorry," He says with his voice full of regret and sorrow 

"I know there is nothing I could possibly say that would make you forgive me but I just want you to know that since I found out you didn't actually cheat on me I have been filled with so much guilt and regret for how I treated you," He says and I just nod 

"Why did you just assume I was a horrible person who'd cheat? I thought you knew me better than that, Jack," I say while leaning forward "I..." he starts to say but cuts himself off to take a deep breath 

"At first I didn't believe it, I knew you wouldn't have done that but then my manager had me so convinced that you actually did, he told me there were other pictures of you guys holding hands and that you had actually cheated with that dude," He says while playing with his hands; something he always did when he was anxious. 

"So once he had me convinced I just didn't want to hear your side, 'cause I didn't want you to lie to me. But of course that was so fucking stupid because he told me about a week ago that you didn't cheat and that there weren't any other pictures," He says and I bite my bottom lip 

"I was furious with him, like beyond pissed because, Indi you looked so hurt in any picture of you I saw, he told me you weren't eating and I have never wanted to book a flight faster in my life to just be there for you but I knew you wouldn't have wanted that," He says quickly with his eyes slightly watering and so were mine 

"I tried to fire him but I can't for another seven months because it's in the contract I signed, but I'm trying everything in my power to get out of it because he has completely ruined my life. And this whole relationship with Natalie is fake, and I'm also trying to get out of that, but it's not working," He says with his voice starting to shake 

"I even resorted to texting your mom to see if you were okay, but she didn't answer me, then I tried Willow but the texts wouldn't go through so then I had to text Josh and he explained a little bit to me but said he didn't want to talk about it anymore cause it wasn't his business, but he told me that you were doing better and there was so much relief that washed over me," He says and a tear falls down my face but I quickly wipe it

"I know I hurt you, badly, and I know there will never be anything I can say that will undo everything that you have been through in these last few weeks, but I will try everything in my power to have you forgive me," he says while reaching for my hand but I pull it away "Sorry," He whispers while shaking his head 

"Jack, believe me, I want to forgive you and everything to just suddenly be good again, but I can't. because If I forgave you then everything I went through and everything that happened is kind of just pointless," I say and he nods his head in understatement 

"Here ya go," The waitress interrupts while setting our food down "Thank you," Jack says to them with a smile before they walk away 

"I get it Indigo, I really do, and I'm so beyond sorry," He says while dropping his smile and looking at me "I know you are Jack, I can tell, but If I forgive you so easily then I'll never forgive myself," I say lowly 

"I know, but I do hope one day you can," he says "I do too, but it's going to take a lot of work, from both of our ends, because I have to know that you're never going to put me through that again," I say and he nods 

"I know, and I'll work at this every day, and I'm happy to do that because I want you, I want you in my life for as long as possible," He says and another tear rolls down my face

"Thank you," I say softly "For what?" He says confused "For understanding that this isn't gonna be easy," I say 

"Of course, and thank you for hearing me out," He says and I smile slightly 

We both eat our food while continuing to talk about all of this, I tell him about the album I'm writing, and he tells me more about his new movie and how much he regrets sighing onto this project. I don't forgive him but I did miss this, I missed talking to him. I also told him how I'm looking for flats to buy because I'm moving out here and he congratulates me. 

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Author's note

How do we feel about this?