So like, school ended a week or more ago for me and I have some MAJOR tea about my life.
So for one, sorry for no updates since last year, I've been quite busy 💀 (I'm lying don't listen to me) so let me tell you about the most stressful day I've ever had in my life.
Me confessing to my crush. (GASP) (oh my god) (faints)
I know i know, a pussy like me confessing to my crush for the first time? Very tough. Up to that point, I never confessed my feelings to any one of my crushes. It got so bad I got a nosebleed from all the stress. Hell, I even had a nightmare of an old couple chasing me. The old lady fell down the stairs and snapped her neck, while the old man got shot. (Dreams of people chasing you is a sign of stress)
So yeah, that was fun. But like I said, I confessed to my crush on the last. Day. Of. School. In case I got rejected but even then, I wouldn't make a fuss about it. I'd respect her decision and not bother her if she so wishes, because unlike other people I respect women and men of all ages. Unless they're younger than me, then I treat them like children.
Here is proof of my stress:
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After school ended, I went to go confess, but then I chickened out and asked my friend to do it. I watched from afar, scared and hiding behind my friends. It's funny, cause I was confident the night before and then I turned into a mess yelling, "DON'T LET HER SEE ME, DON'T KET HER SEE ME!" It all went well til I noticed people were leaving, making me even more stressed about the fact that I was too scared to talk to her. Hell, even my friend tried to drag me to her after he told her my feelings. After a bit, I saw her heading towards the classroom and that's when I knew I have one more chance.
So I told my friend to bring me to her, and to no matter what, make sure I get there and talk to her. So we followed her and he dragged me by my backpack, pushing me inside with me letting out an "ACK-" my face was flushed, I was embarrassed and nervous, and a goddess stood in front of me. I was scared because I didn't know if she liked girls or not, so I hoped for the best. I wanted to say she was beautiful but I couldn't, I was too flustered to say shit. She kept saying, "you don't have to be embarrassed or nervous it's okay!" She was reassuring me and smiling, to which I became more flustered.
I kept saying, "but I am embarrassed and nervous!" She told me she had to leave multiple times and I kept saying sorry, because I felt bad for holding her back. But soon, I walked out next to her and everything else was a blur. I let her go but then realize I didn't get her number, so I ran out after her and sent my friend to retrieve her number, even though I originally wanted to give her mine. But he came back, saying that she didn't have one and I sulked. I grabbed my stuff and walked back home, miserable but still happy I told her.
So yeah, moral of the story? Make sure she likes girls.
